Saturday, May 26, 2007

Jamelia drives away

Oddly, considering the way the 3AM Girls usually report everything that Jamelia does within seconds of it happening, they seem to have somehow missed the story about her driving off without paying a GBP20 parking fee.

The official line is that she'd "forgotten her purse" and so swerved round the car in front of her at the barrier, with every intention of coming back later to pay:

Her spokesman said: “She intended to return and pay. A row did occur. The fee has been paid.”

The odd thing though - even odder than "how come she didn't realise she had 'forgotten her purse' until the very moment she arrived at barrier, as if she'd run up a big parking fee surely she must have been doing something in that time which would have required a rummage in her handbag? - is: if she fully intended to return and pay, why did she not merely say to the bloke in the booth 'I am Jamelia, who had a minor hit or two a while back, I have suddenly realised I have forgotten my purse, I will go and get money' rather than swerving round the car in front and trying to flee without a word? Obviously, her spokesperson is a n honourable man and would never tell a fib, but surely even he must see that her behaviour, however pure her intentions, was 'driving away from a car park without paying'?


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Love the second line in the story.

"The singer, 26 — who had a hit with Money — realised she had forgotten her purse"

This strenghtens my belief that Sun stories are written by a computer program. The algorithm, probably one of Larry and Sergey Google's early projects, ensures that the second line of a story must refer to the subject's previous work by finding a title vaguely appropriate to the story.

"Jamelia was fighting for her life last night after being attacked by a Jack Russell. The singer - who had a hit with Beware of the Dog - was lightheartedly kicking the savage animal up the arse for a bet."

"George Michael told yesterday how he saved Jamelia from a savage Jack Russell attack by killing the animal with a pistol. The singer - who had a hit with Shoot the Dog - etc"

"Girls Aloud star Sarah Harding has split from her scruffy hack boyfriend. The singer - Who had a hit with 'I Used to Date a Pisspoor Gossip Columnist But Not Anymore' - said he had a tiny etc"

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