Today's 3AM Girls column bizarrely is subtitled "VIP backstage at Live Earth", as if they've got themselves confused with the Sunday People's column. But even more puzzlingly, they've started writing like they're Ed Sullivan:
Well we can assure you, Johnny, you were simply fab.
There's also a bizarre piece about Justin Timberlake:
Our ill-informed rivals claimed that JT was going to appear on stage with Duran Duran. Sorry, but it was never going to happen.
Well done, 3Amies, for, erm, reporting that something didn't happen in front of hundreds of millions people and trying to spin that as somehow proving that they're in the know.
We can all do that: I can exclusively reveal there was never any chance that Phil Collins would bring Sonia on stage to do Somewhere Over The Rainbow. The possibility that a naked Anna Friel would dance to the sound of panpipes on the Wembley stage? That was never, ever going to happen.
Still, the 3AMies did do some useful poking about backstage:
All, we're certain, carbon-offset. We bet.