A few days after everyone else did the 'look, the new Sugar Puffs advert is a bit like something off the Mighty Boosh', Gordon catches up, claiming there's going to be legal action now that the Honey Monster is crimping.
Which would be a great story, if he had anything to back it up more than a folksy, off-the-record, possibly a quote or possibly not:
“He rang the Boosh and congratulated them on their work for Sugar Puffs.
“They were baffled and checked it out on the internet. They hadn’t been asked permission to use the style and are speaking to lawyers about getting the Honey Monster’s crimp removed from the airwaves.”
Indeed, so little does Smart have to back up the central claim of legal action that he's reduced to padding the piece out with stuff cut and paste from fans on the internet (Boosh fans, not Smart fans) rather than anything from Barratt or Fielding. Or someone with any legal knowledge.
You never got this with Jeremy The Bear.
Gordon slaps his own byline on some story about Lily Allen's supposed new romance, although he seems a little unsure about how far it's gone:
LILY ALLEN is getting over her split from CHEMICAL BROTHERS DJ ED SIMONS — by dating ANOTHER musician.
Are they dating, or are they living together? Which is it, Gordon?
If only you had a source with some creepy insight into what happens in Robertson Furze's bedroom. Oh, you do:
'A few weeks ago' - wasn't she still with Ed Simons a few weeks ago? And "it was innocent but it's not any more" - what does that actually mean? They're doing something evil?
The real oddity is that, with all the images of Ed Chemical that are available, Gordon chooses a long-lens, murky paparazzi shot of him to sit on the story - presumably this is meant to be an implication that it was a photo of Ed, last night, not laughing with Lily Allen.