Darkness at 3AM: Beckham picks at her taco

The 3AM Girls have, like Gordon, got to have a chat with Victoria Beckham - they seem to think theirs is somehow exclusive, presumably in the sense that nobody else actually was talking to her at that precise moment.

Victoria, sadly, has been reduced to name-dropping:

"I was like, fuck that's Julia Roberts!

"Incredibly, she knew who David and I were and we got on really well. She's very down-to earth. We're both mums with young children, so we had a lot to talk about. We've swapped numbers and I'm looking forward to catching up with her again.

"Most of my friends in LA, like Katie Holmes and Kate Beckinsale, all have children so we get together and do very normal things.

How incredible that the shy, retiring Victoria Beckham would have come to Julia Roberts' attention. Just fancy.

But don't get carried away that Beckham spends all her time going through OK! Magazines, playing a kind of Bingo where she ticks off the people she's met. Oh, no:

"It's not just celebrities I hang out with though. I've become really good friends with the mums from my sons' school as well."

She often waves at them, we'd imagine.

The talk then turns to vaginas, after she went to a Mexican restaurant:

"It was called Pink Taco. My friends told me after we'd been that it translates to pink vagina, which is not ideal."

Up to a point, Victoria - taco has become a slang term for vagina, but it's a bit like going to Super Sausage and coming away saying "but that translates to massive cock". If Beckham thinks that Taco is Spanish for vagina, what does she think when she sees a sign for Taco Bell? Does she think it's a place offering extreme body modification?