Gordon runs another piece by Pete Samson stressing just how not-gay Ronaldo is, while an accompanying piece suggests that Gordon's mockery might not only have had a nasty taint of homophobia, but were also out of step with public opinion by a good distance:
RONALDO'S tight shorts and smooth body have sparked a copycat rush.
High street stores are reporting a surge in demand for skimpy pants and hair-removal cream.
Debenhams have had to order thousands more figure-hugging trunks.
Still, until Kasabian start dressing like that, Gordon won't be joining in.
As if that wasn't enough for Gordon to cope with, he also runs a piece on how Ashley Cole is showering gifts on Cheryl Cole:
To think, only 18 months ago the couple were on the rocks.
Lured by a certain gossip columnist stood on the cliffs with lights.