Noel bashes the NME, not The Enemy

Given their habit of fawning over his band at a time when they've become little more than a nostalgic joke, you'd have thought that Noel Gallagher would see the NME as a branch of his marketing team.

Not so:

"If I personally see any weasel from the NME at these gigs (which is highly unlikely) they'll be getting escorted off site. In fact, you could do me a favour here. If you see an NME journalist at any of the gigs (and let's face it, they're pretty easy to spot; they don't stray far from hospitality, wear God-awful clothes - particularly the shoes - got dreadful hair and that kind of 'mug me' look about them), give 'em a clip round the ear-hole from me and tell 'em to behave."

Noel Gallagher having a laugh at someone's godawful clothes and dreadful hair, with his tousled Playmobil goes camping style?

But, you'll be wondering, what could have irked Gallagher so much?

Apparently, he's upset that the paper has been trying to create friction between Oasis and The Enemy:

"There's been an attempt by the NME to try and start some juvenile, pathetic feud between the bands in the run-up to these gigs. Can I assure everyone that there is not and never will be anything between the working classes and its heroes."

I don't know whether Gallagher is trying to claim that he is the working class, or if he's the hero of the working classes, or, indeed, which of those claims would be more absurd.

Still, it's good to see that Gallagher isn't the sort to let himself be drawn in to some sort of pointless, empty feud with a band turning out music for a similar sort of audience. That really isn't the Oasis way, is it? Saddle up your horse, Noel...
horse... horsey...
Lovely horse... look at the lovely horse.