Gordon in the morning: When obsessions collide

Today, as is the law, Gordon files a non-story about Robbie Williams:

[H]is feathers are not in the least bit ruffled by the discovery that he's sharing his £7million Wiltshire pile with a ghost.

And not just any old ghost.

The country mansion Rob and his missus AYDA FIELD now call home was once inhabited by HENRY VIII's sixth and last wife CATHERINE PARR.

In his role as JLS' official spokesperson, there's a story which tries to make them sound more interesting:

THEY say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned - and JLS heart-throb MARVIN HUMES has learned this the hard way.

His ex-girlfriend has come out of the woodwork to give her view of his womanising.

But what must keep Gordon awake at night is if he had to choose sides, right? What then?

ROBBIE WILLIAMS will be caught up in charts bloodshed this winter as the biggest releases of the year collide in a four-week frenzy.

Robbie's album Reality Killed The Video Star goes up against JLS's as-yet unnamed first effort in November.

How sweet of Gordo to pretend that the two acts are even in the same order of magnitude. Perhaps he's started to believe there's as much interest in JLS as the column inches he's giving them would have suggested.