Poor Showbiz Zoe

Hankies out, please, as you consider the plight of Zoe Showbiz, out the Showbiz With Zoe Showbiz column in the Sunday Mirror, and - more precisely - just how buried she's become in the new integrated Sunday/Daily Mirror website. Mind you, perhaps it's a wise decision, what with stories like this one:

I was impressed by Island Records' new boyband Avenue at their first showcase gig. Despite a minor car crash that made them late, they performed dance moves that would give Take That a hernia. Their best tune Last Goodbye - a new single out on September 1.

That's such a soft story you could wrap eggs in it and send them through the post. Avenue, apparently, were something to do with the X Factor. We're given to understand the minor car crash was when they drove their vehicle flat out at the big gates in a bid to break out of their horrible lives - "for God's sake, let us return to obscurity... or, um, remain in obscurity but without having to learn dance routines..."