Mojo Honours 2011

You can tell the Mojo Awards are aimed at a more mature audience, as they're sponsored by a gentle scotch rather than a bourbon.

The winners, then:

Breakthrough act: Rumer
Not entirely sure what she's supposed to have "broken through". I know the idea of the idea of an artist struggling for years and then breaking through all that crapola are as outdated as a Beady Eye bassline, but if you're going to give Rumer an award for starting her career, perhaps the category name should be redrafted to something more appropriate? "Most mentioned in arts sections of newspapers"?

Song of the year: Heathen Children - Grinderman
To be fair, that's a choice you're unlikely to see picking up a Brit in the same category. And not just because of qualification problems.

Outstanding contribution to music - PIL
"Good news... Lydon's agreed to come. If we give him a prize. No, no, we've already done the Sex Pistols... well, yes, we could do 'best butter advert by a musician' but I think Douglas the Lurpak butter man plays the trombone...

Public Image did make an outstanding contribution, but the prize should be collected by Wobble, not Lydon.

Classic album - Screamadelica - Primal Scream
Shouldn't this be a re-release of the year prize? That would make some sort of sense.

Merit award - Martha Reeves And The Vandellas
Look, I know the categories are basically just excuses to bring top people into a small hotel room, but has there ever been a case of such a big, ballsy act being given a prize with such a tiny, mimsy name? I used to get merit points for keeping my colouring within the lines.

Inspiration award - Gary Numan
See, does this imply that Numan didn't make an outstanding contribution or have any merit, but did inspire other acts?

Best album - Suck It And See - The Arctic Monkeys
Grim news for the Monkeys, as not only did this album underperform, but now it's been flagged that their audience has shifted into a more comfortable pair of trousers.

Best live act - John Grant
If you say so.

Best compilation - Sweet Inspiration: The songs of Dan Penn & Spooner Oldham
A nice trade-off of the massive number of categories in awards like this (you used to see with the Sounds readers' poll) is that quite often the lower names in the list do provide gentle surprises like this. I'm given to understand the Now Thats What I Call Music table threw bread rolls when this one was announced.

The Les Paul Award - Steve Cropper
And the Owen Paul Award went to Roy Cropper.

The Mojo Medal - Bob Harris
Amusing most self-importantly titled prize going to least self-important recipient conundrum.

Classic songwriter - Squeeze
Cracking songs, yes, but... why Squeeze rather than Difford & Tilbrook?

Vision award - Upside Down: The Creation Story
Vision award. In other words, TV and film. Presumably they were afraid to split out those two categories in case it made the awards giving drag on a bit.

Catalogue release - Orange Juice - Coals To Newcastle
Careful! This isn't a compilation, although it is. And it's not a re-release, because it wasn't. Lovely to see Orange Juice getting a well-deserved prize, though.

The Mojo Maverick - Donovan
Whether his excellent work with The Singing Corner was mentioned isn't recorded.

The Mojo Hero - Eddie Floyd
Not a maverick, though. Let's be clear about that.

The Mojo Icon - Ringo Starr
Neither a maverick, nor a hero.

The Mojo Hall Of Fame - Brian Wilson
He isn't a hero, an icon, or a maverick.

Here's an idea, Mojo - why not scrap the salami-sliced thin and often spurious categories next year, and just have, say, ten Mojo heroes? Perhaps you could organise it by a theme - so 2012 could be "The Mojo trailblazers", and 2013 could be "The Mojo catgeory-jumpers"? Your awards don't really rely on the last twelve months to frame them, so why not stop trying to force an NME Readers Poll style grid onto something that's a bit more you?

Mojo awards happen again

So, I was about to say 'there's usually little interesting in the Mojo awards, but giving a prize to Duane Eddy will, at least, make the ghost of John Peel smile' and then I noticed Mojo believes the song of the year was Fire by Kasabian and I lost the will to type.

Winners in full:

:: Mojo Breakthrough Act – The Low Anthem

:: Mojo Vision Award – Oil City Confidential (film about Dr Feelgood, directed by Julien Temple)

:: Mojo Medal – Daniel Miller (Mute Records)

:: Mojo Maverick Award – Hawkwind

:: Mojo Best Live Act – Midlake

:: Mojo Compilation of The Year – Amorphous Androgynous

:: Mojo Merit – Devo

:: Mojo Classic Album Award – The Stone Roses, The Stone Roses

:: Mojo Catalogue Release Of The Year – The Beatles (for last year's remastered albums)

:: Mojo Roots Award – Kate And Anna McGarrigle

:: Mojo Hero Award – Marc Almond

:: Mojo Classic Songwriter Award – Roy Wood

:: Mojo Best Album – Richard Hawley, Truelove's Gutter

:: Mojo Outstanding Contribution To Music – Sigur Ros

:: Mojo Les Paul Award – Richard Thompson

:: Mojo Inspiration Award – Teardrop Explodes

:: Mojo Lifetime Achievement Award – Jean-Michel Jarre

:: Mojo Song of the Year – Kasabian, Fire

:: Mojo Icon Award – Duane Eddy

:: Mojo Hall Of Fame – Jimmy Page

Mojo woo-hoos Yoko Ono

The Mojo awards for 2009 or whenever have rolled around again, building the publicity on a lifetime achievement award for Yoko Ono:

Mojo chief editor Phil Alexander, who hosted the event, praised Ono, 76, as "a huge influence on modern music".

"She may have been married to one of the most famous men in the world, but she also helped change music as we know it in her own right," he added.

"First, by introducing avant-garde sensibilities to her husband but, just as significantly, by continuing to push the boundaries of what was deemed the norm way after that."

And she broke up The Beatles. Don't forget she broke up The Beatles.

Actually, she probably deserves an award for having had to put up with people blaming her for breaking up The Beatles for the last four decades. Especially since people make it sound like that would have been a bad thing to do.

Sorry, did I say "award"? I meant honour, of course. These are the Mojo Honours, which - according to the magazine - "salutes the timeless, the ineffable". Duffy did well last year. So unutterable as well, then.

This year's other winn... sorry, honorees:
The Les Paul Trophy: Billy Gibbons
Classic songwriter: Johnny Marr
Best live band: Fleet Foxes
Some sort of medal in honour of his label having lasted fifty years, despite having put out Cranberries records: Chris Blackwell
Inspiration: Blur
Best album: Paul Weller - 22 Dreams
Song Of The Year: Elbow - A Day Like This
Hall Of Fame: Mott The Hoople
Breakthrough act: White Lies
Compilation Of The Year - Take Me To The River: A Southern Soul Story
Vision Award - Joy Division
Catalogue Award - Miles Davis (Kind Of Blue 50th Anniversary Edition)
Classic Album Award - The Zombies (Odessey And Oracle)
Maverick Award - Manic Street Preachers
Hero Award - The Pretty Things
Outstanding Contribution To Music - Joe Brown
Roots Awards - Topic Records
Icon Award - Phil Lynott

It's probably fair to say that this is the most eclectic set of award winners - and probably the most interesting Mojo prizewinners list, but it still doesn't really feel like anything beyond an attempt to remind the world that Mojo is still publishing.

Sandie Shaw say 'John, no more'

Sandie Shaw has delivered the sort of eye-rolling, withering put-down of John Lydon that he desperately wishes he was able to dish out to others:

"The biggest gaffe of the [Mojo Awards] evening was by Johnny Rotten. He has turned into a very odd caricature of his former Sex Pistols self.

"When given his award he insulted and swore at everyone present. While this may have gone down well during the punk era, it is out of step with these pragmatic times.

"Some things just don't age well."

There's the wider question, of course, of why he turned up to pick up the prize anyway - after all, didn't he refuse to accept the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame gong because it was putting him in a museum? Then again, if you want the attention, there's no press coverage in sending a sarky note to the Mojo organisers in quite the same way.

Darkness at 3AM: Duffy in floods

What we're a little lost about with the 3AM tale of John Lydon swearing at Duffy when she tried to hug him is: why was she upset?

Surely, if you think Lydon has any cultural value at all, it's because of his iconoclastic, ranting on-stage character? Wouldn't it be more appropriate to burst into tears if Lydon didn't launch into a pantomime "fuck off, you cunt" when you approached him?

Mojo Honours announced

The annual attempt to try and show some interest in the Mojo Awards, then - and, once again, the puzzlement over why they do a copy of the Q/Brits/NME/etc etc awards and not something a little more inspired?

Perhaps the clue is in the less-than-inspired list of winners:

Song of the year: Duffy - Mercy

Breakthrough act: Last Shadow Puppets
Oh, yes - because they came out of nowhere, didn't they?

Best live act: Led Zeppelin
Heaven help us. Still, Mojo must be delighted at the chance to give them something other than a 'old blokes prize' category

Best album: Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Dig, Lazarus, Dig
Okay, this is slightly less predictable. And the prize sponsored by Ford as well. We bet they'll be popping a comp copy into every Focus in-car CD player from now...

Best compilation: Juno
What is point of best compilation prize? What is point?

Inspiration: John Fogerty

Icon: The Sex Pistols

Hall of Fame: The Specials

Classic album: Loveless - My Bloody Valentine

Hero: Motorhead

Catalogue release (no, we don't, either): Cherry Red 1981 - 1984
(Okay, that's a surprising one, and - unlike the Specials and the Valentines, not linked to a major comeback tour)

Les Paul award: John Mayer.

Oh, alright then. John Martyn.

Outstanding contribution: Paul Weller

Roots: Toots
Possibly the first rhyming awards winner since Beth Spewtummer was Brits best newcomer in 1996)

Mojo Vision: Joe Strummer: The Future Is Unwritten
(It turns out they mean best rockumentray)

Mojo Medal: Dave Robinson
We don't know if there's an actual medal - it would be rather fun if there was, and Robinson will have to wear it on his lapel on official occasions.

Legend award: Irma Thomas
It's been noted her contribution has yet to be considered outstanding

Special award: Judy Collins
Judy is, therefore, special and not legendary

Lifetime achievement: Genesis
The citation was careful not to mention the illegal alien video, or - indeed - it's role in inspiring Tescos tortilla chip packaging

Classic songwriter: Neil Diamond
How fortunate to rediscover him while he's out touring a new album

Mojo Awards: They like their Duffy

The annual Mojo awards, which they call the Mojo Honours (slogan: 'Every bit as important as the Q Awards') have issued their shortlist for 2008. It's come out now so you can manage your expectations down.

The nominations in full:

Breakthrough Act
1 Duffy
2 Foals
3 Pete Molinari
4 The Last Shadow Puppets
5 Bon Iver

Best Album
1 Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds – Dig!!! Lazarus, Dig!!! (Mute)
2 Arctic Monkeys – Favourite Worst Nightmare (Domino)
3 Radiohead – In Rainbows (XL)
4 Duffy – Rockferry (A&M/Rough Trade)
5 Robert Plant & Alison Krauss – Raising Sand (Decca/Rounder)

Compilation Of The Year
1 Theme Time Radio Hour With Your Host Bob Dylan (Ace)
2 The Very Best Of Ethiopiques: Hypnotic Grooves From The Legendary Series (Buda/Manteca)
3 Cries From The Midnight Circus: The Ladbroke Grove Scene 1968-1971 (Sanctuary/Universal)
4 From The Motion Picture Control (Warners)
5 Juno OST (Warners)

Song Of the Year
1 LCD Soundsystem – All My Friends (DFA/EMI)
2 Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds – Dig!!! Lazarus, Dig!!! (Mute)
3 The Last Shadow Puppets – The Age Of The Understatement (Domino)
4 Richard Hawley – Tonight The Streets Are Ours (Mute)
5 Duffy – Mercy (A&M/Rough Trade)

Best Live Act
1 Arctic Monkeys
2 Rufus Wainwright
3 Seasick Steve
4 Led Zeppelin
5 Neil Young

Actually, it's easy to mock the Mojos (go on, have a go) and, yes, of course it's got Alex Turner running through it like a rust-stain on a public lavatory wall, but at least there are a couple of names on the shortlist which mark it out as having a slightly different intent to the others. We love the idea that Bon Iver is an act which has, in some way, broken through something in the last twelve months.

Of course, they'll wind up sharing out the prizes between Turner and Duffy and, thus, turn themselves back into a simulacrum of every other awards ceremony. But at least they've tried.

Mojo give the gongs

We're a little surprised that in these multimedia end days in which we live that Mojo appear to have not bothered covering their own awards online, allowing the BBC to carry the winners first. Like not eating the cake at your own birthday party, surely?

Or perhaps they're just a little awkward about the winners:

Butter-advertising Ozzy Osbourne has won the Icon Award; Rehab was the song of the year; The Stooges picked up lifetime achievement awards and, while Ike Turner's habit of beating the shit out of Tina might be causing problems for him at the Edinburgh Jazz festival, it hasn't stopped Mojo presenting him with Best Legend.

Actually, can Legends be comparative? "I'm a better legend than you"? Alice Cooper picked up the hero prize, which is different to being a legend, of course.

Best album has gone to The Good, The Bad and the Queen; Arcade Fire are best live act; Surprisingly, Seasick Steve won the breakthrough act, which will probably do him about as much good as it did Colin Barely Rae last year.

Surviving Marleys a-plenty came out to accept the classic award for Exodus on behalf of Bob; Bjork took what the BBC call "the prestigious inspiration award" - we suspect the adjective is the BBC's, but we're not sure; Joy Division outstanding contribution and Suicide the inspiration in sound prize, whatever that means.

Apparently, all the EMAP magazine awards shows are henceforward going to be sponsored by Bitburger beers:

Adnams marketing director Steve Curzon said: "We know that music and movies are two subjects that score highly among the Bitburger target audience.

"Q, Empire, Mojo, Kerrang and Arena are all titles that embody socialising and exclusivity - these are watchwords of the Bitburger positioning within the UK."

We're not entirely sure that if we were trying to position a lager as exclusive we'd throw it at the Kerrang awards, but then we don't work in advertising.