HE'S BACK, HE'S RIGHT: Good news, everybody, with the return of Folk Implosion after a three year gap in operations. Lou Barlow is apparently promising tracks that are "a lot more Black Sabbath influenced than things I could do with Sebadoh" - which is understandable and regrettable. Understandable, because Bob the Builder is more Black Sabbath influenced than Sebadoh. Regrettable, because name dropping Oz is, like, the most obvious thing you can do in 2002, don't you think?
Rebound [Rolling Stone] - exactly how is the band Not Sebadoh right now?

HE'S BLACK, HE'S WHITE: Clearly, the Jacko reborn as panther stunt this week has been more about wounded pride at poor sales and the loss of the Beatles back catalogue, but let's try to take Jackson's claims about the music industry seriously - or as seriously as we can when a man holds up a placard marked 'the good, the bad, the ugly' and has chosen his own face to illustrate the first of these.
Jackson claims that the record company treats artists like shit. This much is true. He also claims that certain music industry figures are stinking racist scum. That is probably true; shamefully unremarkable. The problem comes when Jackson tries to special plead and claim that black artists are singled out to be shafted by the industry. That, of course, is bollocks. Go tell it to Courtney, to George Michael, to Michelle Shocked. Then try to tell it to Beyonce, to Prince (who at least left the race card underplayed in his record company dispute), to Dre, to your own sister. Jackson claims
"The record companies really, really do conspire against the artists. They steal, they cheat, they do whatever they can. Especially against the black artists." And, if it wasn't for that pay-off, you'd have to agree with him. But those five words are bitter little pills, designed to elevate what is a business dispute into a race issue. Jackson is trying to force Sony's hand in a boardroom battle by crying "is it cause I black?" No, Michael, it's not.
First up, it's as ridiculous as believing that Eminem sits down to answer his fan mail at a big desk to assume that the execs who make the decisions to crush their artist's dreams down to make some juice have any idea if the names on their pieces of paper are black, white, women or men - EMI, for example, axed one of its entire Scandanvian wings because it didn't even know it existed. Second, if the industry is so stinkingly racist, and shafting black artists, how did you make the money to buy Neverland, and to keep chimps in the luxury to which they've become accustomed? Isn't it a bit funny how the sudden realisation that you're working for the Klan coincides with really, really bad album sales? See, from where we're sitting, it looks like Sony have been incredibly supportive of you since Thriller, during a period of time when you've been doing Interesting things, accused of appalling crimes, and making mostly awful records. Sour grapes and bitterness are one thing, but to try to hijack an issue as divisive and dangerous as race to get your own back on a bloke you've fallen out with is disreputable.
Multi-millionaire Michael Jackson has something to say [Guardian] - it's not 1950 anymore, and you're no Billie Holliday...

"HE LIED TO ME" CRIES NOEL: Something slightly sinister in Noel's outburst about George Michael's Walk The Dog single, don't you think? Noel seems to think that because George was in the closet for a long time, this means he's an unfit person to have an opinion on world affairs. Noel Gallagher, you might remember, popped in to show his support for Tony Blair just after the grinning head of the nation won his first election victory - a victory that owed quite a bit to Peter Mandelson, a man who would never be less than totally upfront about his sexuality. But why is Noel so concerned about Michael having "lied" about his sexuality? (As if, Noel, you couldn't tell - the hair? the leather jackets? the endless promotion of David Austin?) Did Noel have a little tiny crush on Wham when he was a wee boy with two eyebrows? Does Noel have a whole heap of issues here?
And besides: In what way is Noel fit to lay down who should or shouldn't have an opinion? We've not forgotten his and his brother's pointless yakking after the World Trade Centre which showed a lack of both perspective and understanding and, if we had to choose (and let's hope it never comes to this) I'd rather side with Michael's simplistic Blair-battering and strange world of polymorphus peversity than the gallaghers dull, little englander me tub thumping.
Both your latest singles are shite, mind.
Michael is also getting it in the neck for "not releasing" Walk the dog in the US, which is a bit unfair since he doesn't even have a record deal in the States at the moment, and sticking out a record in America which says "The UK is America's lapdog" would be seen less as satirical, more as accurate reporting. And, besides, in the UK we raise an eyebrow at George's claims to want to seduce Cherie Blair and say "Oh, really?", whereas in the US, they'd go "Cherry Bear? Was that one of the Care Bears?" The record is hardly appropriate for an American audience.
Charles Shaar Murray has waded in to defend Michael against Rod Liddle, Today editor and Guardian columnist. In The Guardian, Rod had basically suggested that he might not want to take political science lessons from the man who wrote Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. Hitting back, Murray wrote in The Observer that Liddle was trying to stop 'outsiders' from muscling in on the political comment cake. This is a bit rich, especially when you consider that it was Liddle's Today which gave Gruff from the Super Furru Animals a platform one morning to talk about something; from which we learned merely that popstars don't do "before nine" well. CSM's bit also manages to find enough space to mention that Liddle allows Nick Griffin from the BNP onto Today, but strangely not enough to make it clear that this is because he believes that in a democratic nation, even nazi scum should be allowed to a platform, the better to hang themselves on their own vile words. Funny thing is, Nick Griffin's complaint about the media is that they deny platforms to anyone outside the political mainstream - exactly the same thing Charles is banging on about.

MORE ON VIBE: So, following on from the extra details provided by a passer-by in comments last week, we've found out that the artist who is the only thing on the show - variously called something like Alisee or Angel - is, in fact, the wife of Steve Bennett. Bennett made £37million offloading jungle.com just before the dotcom sector collapsed like a asthmatic in a cloud chamber, and so has money to fritter away on trying to make his wife into a star. It turns out she's got form for this, as Chris Tomlinson related in passing when Bennett invested in a karaoke website; she once stood up at an Institute of Directors dinner and belted out 'I will always love you.' Steve, of course, could have made her a star more easily - with his cash, a spot of payola and chart rigging would have got her on TOTP faster than you can say "Isn't that sort of thing frowned upon?" rather than going down this route which does look somehow desperate, don't you think?
Besides... would you really want your wife to be in such a reprobate industry. No less a pop personage than Beyonce Knowles has told the, um, Radio Times that the whole music industry can mess your head up and make you sad. Even if your body is bootylicious.
It's a shit business, says Beyonce - don't put your sister on the stage, Ms Knowles. No, really, please, please don't...

POACHER TURNS EGG: As if he wasn't 'busy' enough elbowing his was into cartoon bands, and taking over Malawi like a latter-day Mark Curry, Damon Albarn has now decided to become a music journalist, too. he's going to write for the reactivated Songlines magazine, the official journal of noodling about 'world' music (or 'rest of the world music', to give it is more spookily accurate name).
Meanwhile, Saturday's Weekend Guardian featured a piece by Louise Wener, who used to be in Sleeper but is now a writer. She retold the Sleeper tale, and showed herself to be as good at prose as she was at fine tunes, although her grasp of research is a bit... um, flaky, shall we say? (T'pau contemporaries of Jam, Smiths, Blondie?). Still, it all bodes well for the launch of her book, although that too
Oi, Albarn... Noooooo - of course, Blur did once guest edit NME...
We always liked Sleeper - of course, their big mistake was in losing the square brackets from their name
We're cheap whores, you know - buy Goodnight Steve McQueen from Amazon
Sample from chapter 1 - actually, Louise, Winner Takes All didn't show the punters the prize, not in the classic Tarby years, it was in a suitcase at the end. And, erm, Millionaire did. In a big glass pyramid in the first series.

GOD OF SICKNOTE: Marilyn Manson has been hospitalised due to "going too far in the creation process" of his new album, apparently. If only he'd gone a wee... bit... further...
Send no flowers [Dotmusic] - what other euphemisms for 'drugged himself stupid' can you think of, children?

HEY! WASN'T THAT OUR IDEA?: Back before Napster collapsed, XRRF suggested that rather than wasting time and money on pursuing file sharing through the courts, the labels would have been better off merely creating a pile of junk files and swamping the services with them. Guess what? The RIAA have just twigged that it would be a great idea to create a load of junk files, and then swamp Kazaza and so on with them. Maybe a bit late now - fileswapping has become an established passtime, and so the labels have missed their chance to strangle the hobby at birth - but it's got to be better than their threat to start suing kids for copying the Eminem album amongst themselves.
We call it spoofing - but how can you tell a fake disappointing Gomez track from the real thing?

THIMPLY THE BETH: Even if she has committed the solecism of recording a duet with Ryan Adams (we love Ryan, but he's starting to become the new Evan Dando, isn't he? Or the indie Robbie Williams?), we're dleighted to see the return of Beth Orton, and her homecoming interview in this week's Guardian Review. She's especially good on the subject of Lilith Fair:
Didn't she think the idea of a women-only festival was a little, well, patronising? "Yes, completely!" she almost shouts, her whole body jerking up. "I think it just ghettoises women musicians even more, and it lumps us all together." So why did she do it?
"Because my management said it would be a good thing to do. If I'm being honest, I can't really see, politically, what it was about, other than being a gimmick. At the end of the day, people were just saying, 'Yeah, it's just a bunch of birds on stage.' Even I was saying that. It was kind of a cliche."
You can read the whole thing here - and there's the cutest little picture, too

THE EX-MAN COMMETH: Here at XRRF, we tend to think Ex-Rental are a good thing, and so we're chilling a small bottle of Blue Nun to toast the news that they're heading into the studio to make their debut album. Of course, making a record out of nothing but smudged lipstick, a photo of the early human league, pixie dust and talent can involve late nights and early mornings; and since sean and lucy aren't prepared to set foot outside unless they can guarantee their make-up has been correctly applied and their peachy-little butts are free from VPL, they're going to be taking a break from live performance. You can catch their last outing before purdah at Lipgloss this coming Thursday, and if you value your life, you'll go.
Their website will probably have a flyer - keep your hands off Sean and Lucy, mind...

CURIOUSITY ADDS TO CURIOSITY: Rumours that Liverpool's Lomax is set to franchise have now been confirmed, with the news that the good people of Stoke are due to receive a 2000-punter sized version of the former Liverpool legend sometime in September. Meanwhile, the reasons for the move from a self-contained venue in Liverpool into living cheek-by-jowl with Cream, sharing the Nation, seem to have been changed. Now, the line is that while the Hotham Street venue was "great for train access", being in "the city centre should now attract passers-by, not just regulars." So, a venue that people could and would travel easily to is less of an asset than one that might attract vague passers-by, is it? (How many people actually decide to go and see a gig on a whim, anyway? Unless it's a pub band, in for two quid sort of deal?) The Lomax are apparently also now claiming that "every club and venue has a lifespan and the skill of succeeding is knowing when that lifespan is up", which sounds to us as close as we're likely to get to "nobody was coming to the clubnights anymore."
What's even more bemusing is how The Lomax is hoping to balance its historic position as the heart of Indie Liverpool with its new role, having taken over Braveheart, as The Lomax Entertainments Arts Academy. Slightly massaging the truth, the venue that can rightly claim to have resurrected the Bunnymen and created the classic indie nightspot of the 90s is now also trying to take the credit for Kym Marsh and Atomic Kitten. Perhaps the move was so that the people who supported the club in the glory days didn't have to see the 'Max become bland manu-pop's bitch?

POWER OF THE BITCH: The Makers of PopBitch must be grinning this morning, as the power of the gossboard, and more importantly, its mailout, to set the music agenda got a double demonstration yesterday. First, Kylie 'fesses up to Marie Claire about her cellulite and how she looks so good through the magic of the airbrushers art - a nice piece of media management turning the 'bitch 'Kylie's bum job' story into a PR plus ("she's just like us" squeals a nation, hugging the pop pixie ever closer to their hearts); then EMI takes the sorry step of issuing a press release to try and quash the story in yesterday's mail-out that Geri is heading for popscurity and The Dumper. You'd have to wonder whether EMI stopped to think that issuing a statement about something in Popbitch was the best way of managing the media on this one. Meanwhile, why not enjoy EMI denying they were terminating Mariah Carey's contract again?

POP TV: So, Channel 5 is bringing its Pepsi Chart Show into port, retiring the programme which showed us what Dr Fox actually looked like with a highlights package or two, and the channel is set to reveal its "replacement" - does the concept of a show called 'Pop' sound like a horribly cobbled-together concept? Malcom Gerrie, the man who once gave the universe the Tube, describes the show as an attempt to create a show that doesn't stick to the agenda of "what's getting radio play or selling records." Which makes you ask: so, what agenda will be set, then? And what's so new about a show that doesn't stick to the charts anyway? Even It's Lulu would poke about in the music undergrowth. This smacks a little of 'The big stars don't want to bother doing the poor relation of Top of the Pops, so we've come up with a format that allows us to stuff the show with any old-new rubbish." Still, we'll get a chance to see when one of 21 kicks off in August.
Channel 5 Goes Pop [MediaGuardian] - still, by not worrying about what sells, at least they can continue to carry Posh

QUOTE: "The Harmonica is not an instrument; it's a thing to make records worse" - John Aizelwood

IT HAD TO HAPPEN: We knew the Walker would come to regret using lower case for its 'art of Paul McCartney' signage - the inevitable "f"s which are starting to appear on the roadsigns are looking all-too-genuine from a distance...

LIFE BEYOND THE 'GALAXY: Missing Audiogalaxy? Glummly considering putting on your shoes and socks and a pair of trousers, plodding down HMV, and actually paying for your records? Hang about - Pitchfork Media has a list of the plausible alternatives to letting musicians eat, each considered and reviewed for you to pick and choose.

WHOULISH: Apparently the people at the hotel where John Entwistle died (under a stripper, according to 'It's how he would have wanted it' rumours we suspect are on a par with Mama Cass' ham sandwich) are already managing to make a few bob off people who want to sleep, snog and rut on the bed where the Ox's heart finally said 'No more.'

ANT IN COURT: Alan Ant appeared in court yesterday, facing charges connected to the incidents at the Prince of Wales pub in January this year. He pleaded not guilty and was bailed to appear again for a pre-trial hearing on July 10th.

IS THAT YOUR FINAL ANSWER?: Yesterday, we found ourselves being nice to Hucknall. Today, we nod quietly as Chris Tarrant tells the Radio Academy that radio is being too driven by focus groups and "playing thirty seconds of records down phones to old ladies." Which is, of course, undoutably true, but it's just a pity that one of the most powerful men in local radio only thinks to mention this after he's handed his notice into Capital, one of the worst offenders for this sort of thing.
I ask them what do you think of the Stereophonics, they say it tests well - so, not only research, but pisspoor research, too

CREAM? OR HARD TIMES?: Blimey, we knew that things were getting tough at Cream, but they've been reduced to running with a glorified Butlin's talent show to find someone to pick up a contract to be a resident for 2003. Publicity stunt? Genuine way of seeking out new talent? Or has the supply of talent willing to work at the Nation got so thin they're really desperate to discover the Darius of the Decks?
MTV Dance reports - if this fails, Karaoke-dj may be the only option left

WE WILL FIX YOU: Good news for Clinic fans in the States, of whom there are a few and about to be more. Walking With Thee has been picked up by Universal and is going to be reissued on July 23rd. We always said they were better than Mansun.

DOESN'T MEAN WE LIKE YOU, MICK: Strange days when we find ourselves praising Mick Hucknall, but the feisty redhead has done the right thing by going to the House of Commons today to try and argue against the current legislation that makes it illegal for pubs to have live entertainment without copious licenses. If the 'two in a bar' rule gets knocked on the head, it'll free up pubs to enable them to offer a lot more hot band action (in theory) which sounds like it could only be a good thing to us. We're merely curious as to whether Mick was speaking with his musicians hat on, or his hotelier hat on. Just as long as he was wearing some sort of hat.
Mr. Hucknall Goes To Westminster [BBC] - "Please, don't do Holding Back The Years" begs committee

NOEL'S VOTE MUST HAVE GOT LOST IN THE POST: However much Noel and Liam might try and convince us that they're back to form, that they never lost the fire, that it's still with them, their fans seem to disagree. Q have taken a poll of the Best Oasis Songs Ever, and you have to get down below number 30 before you find something recorded since 1995. Live Forever wins, in case you're wondering.

I COLLECT, I REJECT: What's not surprising is that Eminem's old car has turned up on EBay, but that according to the auction report, the discarded purple automobile wasn't dredged from the bottom of some river, or even lost in a poker game, but traded in - are times that tuff for Marshall that he needs to cut a deal with his local Straight Talkin' Al?

You'll find us under 'web design for Christians'

WHAT THE POP PAPERS SAY: GLASTO RIP-OFF EDITION:
interesting piece in this week's New Statesman reveals that Toyah, high-priestess of post-punk and self proclaimed believer in wanting to be free is running down the alleyway screaming and shouting very loud over the prospect of foreign people in her neighbourhood - they're proposing sighting one of the government's hypermarket-sized refugee 'welcome centres' in her village. Teletubbies might love each other very much, but Toyah seems less keen on outsiders...

this, of course, when that other great star who rode the tail end of punk, Bob Geldof, has come out as being against the Euro. Bob's been all over the papers like a rash saying that he can't think of a single argument for the single currency, which is extraordinary for a man who crossed a border to find fame and fortune, don't you think? On the heels of Joe Strummer's appeals to people to make sure they stay away from Glastonbury unless they can afford a week's worth of minimum wages for a ticket, and Private Eye engages in correspondence over the irony of EMI now owning Virgin Records, and thus making money out of the reissue of the Sex Pistol's EMI, you have to wonder if there are any punks left who have any integrity left...

talking of integrity, the nme has quietly stuck its cover price up twenty pence this week - before the last big redesign, this would cover the cost of slapping on a glossy cover; now that comes as standard, it's not clear why the Glastonbury Review edition merits a larger entry fee - perhaps its taken a leaf out of Eavis' book, and wants to keep out the riff-raff. Certainly the cover - the back of some bloke and no coverlines that aren't related to the fest - is the equivalent of a forty foot fence...

news: Richard Ashcroft is working on two albums right now, and warns us "I'd sit on the fence for a while if you're going to write me off." Though, of course, it's a measure of how his solo career has flopped so far that the nme headline still refers to him as "former verve man"; dave grohl joined the queens of the stone age for their glasto warm-up, which is on a par with Bill Hicks joining the team of TV to Go; Jack has hinted that the White Stripes might not be around for long - probably the strain on Meg's back is starting to tell; oh good - John Squire is working on an album where he's the only talent. So, not unlike the first Stone Roses album, then; the nme gives as much space to the Entwistle obit as an out of focus shot of Jared Leto; an NME reader jumped on the stage and sang 'Yellow' when Coldplay played the Royal Festival Hall: ("It was terrible, we had to listen to this faceless bloke singing really badly - and then this bloke invaded the stage" a gig-goer wasn't heard to say); Liam Gallagher reckons Oasis are close to greatness - presumably this means they're sharing a dressing room with The Charlatans for that Finsbury Park gig...

on bands: D4 - fifty percent shaggable New Zealand Stooges plus; Audio Bullys - zero shaggability brit dance...

United against The Strokes, it's The Icarus Line, looking like, um, the Strokes after they've muddled their laundry with the White Stipes, apparently the coming together of a fucked-up massive...

Mike Skinner, The Streets aka, chooses the ten track for his special CD - Beenie Man and, um, The Streets are on there...

Ashanti. Who she? R&B rent a voice now striking out under her own banner. Um, and forthcoming Sabrina The Teenage Witch cameo actor...

Did anyone order another Oasis interview? Yammer yammer great words yammer new Wonderwall yammer Brian Molko looks like a cunt... at one point, Liam accuses nu punk acts of looking "scruffy". And they're talking about the Osbournes. Not that they've seen it, but Alan has a mate who's seen an episode. Or at least that bit with The Weather Channel that got shown as the teaser everywhere...

albums: idlewild - the remote part ("they're clearing space for Idlewild in the Tate Modern", 9); the vines - highly evolved ("if the Strokes were John the Baptist of rock, then maybe...", 9); various - all tomorrow's parties 2.0 ("no duff tracks", 7); seagull screaming kiss her kiss her - red talk ("another indispensible band from a far-flun corner of the globe", 8)...

sotw is, we're asked to believe, fischerspooner - emerge ("delirious, unbearable, overbearing"), beating supergrass - never done nothing like that before ("they have, but never quite as well"), and the bellrays - they glued your head on upside down ("you'll find yourself becomming aroused")...

live: muse in Imola ("wonderfully rock and roll"); Icarus line in camden ("can't help but sound nasty"); moldy peaches in leicester ("who needs marshall amps anyway?"; the polyphonic spree in camden ("we defy you not to fall under their influence"); suede ("their dark roots show through") and peaches ("alternates dominatrix techno with PJ Harvey blues-rock moans") at the Festival Hall...

and, finally, your pull-out and toss-away glasto review section: top band - the vines; best trousers - jason pierce; most likely to headline next year - doves; band of the people - the charlatans (does this make the Princess Dianas of pop?); shortest visit - nelly furtardo. There, that saved you £100 and/or £1.70, didn't it?

WANNA BUY AN ISLAND?: The continued saga of Vivendi Universal makes it look more and more likely that the future of the congolomerate lays in pieces, raising the possibility that the Universal Records behemoth could be splintered into its constituent parts. You'd have to wonder if this would make Chris Blackwell tempted to pick up the total control of Island again, and make the label into something approaching what it once was?

FLAMIN-GO-GO: While we're on the subject of recent record releases, long-time XRRF favourites The Flamingo Fifty have released a debut slab of entertaining noise attention demand through No Concessions Records. We once described them as a cross between The Breeders, The Ronettes, PJ Harvey and, oh, some other people, and they've not done anything to let us down since, so you might well want to find out how to get hold of a copy.

A HIPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAPPY: Congratulations to the team behind Liverpool's Bandwagon nights, who celebrate their first anniversary this week with a double-headed twin party thingy. Managing to survive without funding from the Arts Council, ESF, EMF or the lottery, the club has managed to almost single handedly revive and retail the concept of Liverpool as a place with a musical future rather than one large albatross in the past in a way that should shame some other local venues as they sit on their centrally-funded asses wondering where it all went wrong. If Liverpool deserves to be European City of Culture in 2008 - and, you know, I'm far from convinced we do - it should be about the sort of stuff the 'wagon are doing, not as the handsomely retainered Sir Bob Scott believes; basing the bid on the fact that The Beatles Came From Here, You Know. Sadly, ironically, humourously, Liverpool City magazine is running a competition this issue which asks "Which Liverpool band has had more number ones than anyone else?" - obviously went to press before Elvis stole the Beatle's crown, then. Which has taken us off the point we were making somewhat. But, yes, with Bandwagon (and Jump Ship Rat), Liverpool actually has some promise of managing to have some sort of culture left by 2008. That's got to be worth celebrating.

ANYWAY, MUSIC: Let's stop being pink for a moment (but not stop being Pink , of course) and remember music, the fluffy bouncy happy stuff that made us start this thing in the first place. Remember because, of course, Fosca have got a new single out on Shinkansen; it's called 'secret crush on the third trombone' and is up the standard you'd expect of the soon-come album Diary of an antibody. Clearly, Dickon and his gang have given up all hope of dislodging the Dead Icons/Fake Icons from the top of the charts as the single boasts 30 b-sides (26 more than are allowed under chart rules), thereby denying us the opportunity to see them on Top of the Pops.
More Fosca news. All Fosca news.

MORE ON CLEAR: For those of you wondering exactly what the implication of Clear Channel taking over, say EMAP or Capital would actually be, you might like to consider how the Americans are responding to their mopping up of as many stations in each major market as they can. The estimable Future of Music coalition has carried out research into audience's desires there - including the consolidation of ownership, which gets less than one in ten support. [For a journalistic overview of the results, try the Chicago Tribune's report].