Friday, February 09, 2007

Noel on a roll

You know, a while back, Noel Gallagher's tiresome attempts to sound controversial were so dull, like a local radio DJ trying to spark some debate amongst a late-night phone-in audience, we used to find our attention drifted so much we found ourselves imagining what naughty lemurs might get up to, instead of paying full heed to what he had to say. Luckily, we think we've beaten that tendency.

Just in time, as Noel has something to say:

Speaking about bands who focus on political issues rather than playing their back catalogues, Gallagher singled about U2's focus on charities.

He said: "Play 'One', shut the fuck up about Africa."

Gallagher also hit out against Radiohead. He said: "Thom Yorke sat a piano singing, 'This is fucked up' for half-an-hour. We all know that Mr Yorke.

"Who wants to sing the news? No matter how much you sit there twiddling, going, 'We're all doomed,' at the end of the day people will always want to hear you play 'Creep'. Get over it."

Yes... much more interesting and worthwile to sing a song about how much you like doing cocaine, Noel, you're quite... lemurs... sorry... yes, Noel... and Bono. Yes... singling out his... um...


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

i'm lost on the coke reference...care to fill me in? creep wasnae about that was it?!

simon h b said...

Sorry... that was a reference to how Noel's greatest contribution was a song about doing cocaine, rather than Thom's. I suspect Creep is about little else than not being able to get off with someone.

karlt said...

I'm more puzzled about this 'Outstanding Achievement' for which Oasis are to be honoured.
It must be very odd for Noel to be heading for his 40's and still not have had a single cogent thought about anything, anything other than what he was going to drink, snort or stick his cock in. Imagine that for a minute. Not a single idea has passed beteween that monobrowed fuckwits ears. Ever. Come on kids, let's get together on this and try and give poor little Noel a thought. About something. Just GBP45 will make Noel a Friend of the British Museum. A mere GBP135 will get him a subscription to New Scientist. Alternatively, the Early Learning Centre has tons of brightly coloured things that might attract his attention.
Please excuse me Simon. I've been drinking.

Peter said...

I feel a paradox on the one hand its Gallagher, lord of the idiots, but on the other hand he is being critical of Bongo and Thom Yorke.

Anonymous said...

karlt, i see your point, but feel you should remember that this is the man who wrote:

"What you gonna do when the walls come falling down?
You never move you never make a sound.
and where you gonna swim with the riches that you found?
If you're lost at sea then I hope that you drown"


i'm not making some joke here. it may be simple but it's pretty good nonetheless. and yes i know 99 per cent of his lyrical output is COMPLETE UTTER TOSH. but there is the odd eyebrow-raiser in there (supersonic, headshrinker, ) which seperates him and his brother from the likes of embrace. only a fool wouldnt admit that.

saying that, damon albarn should really be getting whatever the brits are giving oasis...even if he doesnt please everyone, his work this century is waaaaaay more prolific than any of the other britpop dinos. awards suck anyways.

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