3AM Girls: In no way part of an attempt to market a TV show

The story of Simon Cowell being bugged and followed is in no way an attempt to add drama to the X Factor, oh no:

The newly-single X Factor mogul was "completely freaked out" after a sophisticated tracking device was found attached magnetically to the undercarriage of his flash Bentley Continental.

That this story has turned up on the soft shores of 3AM rather than what remains of the Mirror's news pages makes it in no way any the less credible:

He gets easily bugged by out-of-tune warblings on the X Factor, but the tables have been turned on Simon Cowell - he is being bugged by a Secret Service-style stalker.

Does that actually make any sense?

Our source tells us: "Simon is completely freaked out by this. He can't believe someone has gone to so much trouble and expense to monitor his every movement. It's extremely sinister.

"He was aware that someone, dressed in motorbike leathers and a crash helmet, kept turning up a few minutes after he went every-where. He couldn't work out how that person knew his movements."

Hang about - a person in motorbike gear and a helmet turning up at inappropriate moments? I think I might be able to help you, Simon:



So, let's see: someone has managed to somehow attach an expensive, mysterious tracking device to Cowell's car, without him realising and then - having been so secretive - turns up everywhere that Cowell goes dressed in a B-movie outfit that makes them stand out so much that he keeps spotting them. That's in no way inconsistent at all.