Gordon in the morning: Threads

I think I must have missed this:

LIAM GALLAGHER turned the cagoule from the trainspotter’s choice into a fashion staple for any lad about town.

He did? Cagoules? Are you sure, Gordon?

So I imagine his Pretty Green clothing range will go down well.

Well, if they can still find people to buy Oasis albums, there's a chance.

The OASIS rocker’s designs go on general sale tomorrow, the day after the lads kick off their summer tour with a mega gig at Manchester’s Heaton Park.

"On general sale"? Why, have they been doing special sales only for the fashion-forward? And what exactly does "on general sale" mean?

In this case, it means they've switched the website on as, surprisingly, no shop that actually sells clothes has shown any interest in stocking them:

At the moment Pretty Green is only available online. We plan to launch an exclusive range in the top fashion stores around the world for Autumn / Winter 09. If you are a retail buyer please email us at wholesale@prettygreen.com. The wholesale collection will vary from the site and will include a premium collection.

That's from Liam's trouser website - the "if you'd like to sell my clothes, please email us" doesn't sound that desperate, does it? Besides, all those top fashion stores are on board for winter.

Sorry, Gordon: you were attempting to turn 'man switches on retail website' into a story hefty enough to warrant publication, weren't you?

I wonder whether Liam will set up a stand to hawk his clobber to gig-goers?

No, he won't.

This needs some more padding, doesn't it?

If he did, I’m sure Radio 1 DJ ZANE LOWE would be first in the queue.

Erm.... why?

It turns out that Lowe has said he quite likes Gallagher's music:

The Kiwi has named the frontman as his fave rock star.

Not that Liam has ever been unsure of himself.

He once said: “There’s ELVIS and me. I couldn’t say which of the two is best.”

Is it just me, or is this a bit patchwork? Three disparate elements stapled together in a clumsy way to try and make it seem like it flows? And not quite succeeding? Gordon isn't reporting any more, he's quilting.