Gordon in the morning: Time on her hands

That's the trouble with divorce, isn't it? It's not the couple, it's innocent people who get hurt.

Jordan is relaunching her pop career.

I say relaunching - it's more "diving in an attempt to see if there's anything to salvage following the sinking of her last attempt".

Gordon reports that she's signed up with "David Bowie's management" - although it's The Outside Organisation, who are media managers rather than traditional music industry management. They're also responsible, for instance, for the Digital Spy Reality TV Awards and Tim Kash.

Sadly, Gordon has decided against getting his team to mock up a picture of Jordan made to look like Kash, and has instead gone with a picture of her looking like Aladdin Sane.

Smart warns us to expect a "chart battle" between her and Andre by the end of the year.

[Flash forward to December, as a record label guy shows Andre some paperwork - "This chart shows you that 87% of your CDs were returned unsold... and this chart shows that 96% of hers were..."]