Oh god. Oh god. Oh holy god. I cannot decide if it would be worse to discover that Blur think this:
A Blur flat cap.
(There's also a tea set.)
A Blur flat cap. It's such a terrible thing, I want to buy one to wear just so that I can be sure of being able to find a person wearing one - me - to slap about the face with a copy of SugarApe.
Oh god. You can just imagine them honking when this came to be signed off, can't you? You can just picture Alex James, putting down his sodding cheese board to giggle at THE VERY IDEA. You can close your eyes and see Damon Albarn putting his call to Malawi on hold to pull on a prototype. You can see Phil Daniels walking through the back of the shot, wearing one.
Damien Hirst is using a Bedazzler to cover his in Swarovski crystals.
It's a Blur flat cap.
And there's also a tea set.
Stuart Maconie was unavailable for comment, but reports suggested he was eating every one of the 272 pages of every copy of 3862 Days that was ever published, in the hope that it might make it stop.
Blur have launched a flat cap. With their logo on.
Graham Coxon has produced a Venn Diagram, with "northern" and "southern" sections, and the word IRONY written in the middle.
A flat cap. From Blur.