NEWS TO SEND YOU INTO GOOD FRIDAY WITH A HEAVY HEART: Blur are going back in the studio. And Damon's also working on another Gorillaz album. It wasn't clear what we'd done to deserve the first one, but perhaps he's going to get Banksy to collaborate on the artwork this time round?

"STUNNED AND HUMILIATED": That's how Anthony Fitzgerald was left feeling after Prince's bodyguard lunged at him and grabbed his digital camera. Fitzgerald was trying to take a photo of Mr. Prince at the time, it should be pointed out. Of course,Fitzgerald is now claiming he's having trouble sleeping and so is suing Prince. Eh? How is this causing him trouble sleeping? Is he afraid that Prince might appear in his bedroom, and that the whole thing might happen all over again? The best thing about this whole story, of course, is that Prince's bodyguard is called Trevor. Just Trevor.

OKAY, ONE LAST COBAIN POST: Just because we were always a sucker for when Janet Ellis used to come on Danny Baker and read chunks of her teenage diaries, and because sharing how we were when we were teenagers is something that calls for a deal of courage: Lindsayism shares the poem she wrote to mark Kurt's passing. "Tumbling lemmings with screams and sighs."

OKAY, ONE LAST COBAIN POST: Just because we were always a sucker for when Janet Ellis used to come on Danny Baker and read chunks of her teenage diaries, and because sharing how we were when we were teenagers is something that calls for a deal of courage: Lindsayism shares the poem she wrote to mark Kurt's passing. "Tumbling lemmings with screams and sighs."

SEEING YOUR ARSE: Thankfully, we have no photos of Eminem mooning the audience of German TV programme Pro7. Though we fear it's only a matter of time. Apparently he was making a political point about how much more freedom of expression there is in Germany.

FACE SAVED?: The closure of the Face might not be quite as cut and dried as we'd all thought: EMAP has apparently had tonnes of offers to buy the title, although rumours that most plan to merge it with One-Two-Testing haven't yet been denied or, indeed, started.

SNOW'S OFF: The troubles of trying to bring a gig to a remote - well, not that remote - island off the Scottish coast have proven too much for Snow Patrol, who've replaced their Isle of Arran dates with one in the Glasgow University union instead. Apparently the police on the Island objected to one venue because it was "too close to the Main Road"; their other objections included the refusal of the band to play inside a giant man made of whicker-work and to dance with a naked Britt Ekland.

MURRAY MINCE: There's an extraordinary piece about the Radio One in The Times
- although Murdoch writing warmly about the BBC shouldn't be discouraged, it's still quite odd. It kicks off with a picture of a dyed-in-the wool Radio One listener: "...those who have been nourished by the station, who learnt their music at Peel’s knee, who first stumbled across Chris Morris on a late-night Radio 1 slot, who taped Danny Rampling for a big Friday night warm-up, who listen to it today..." - a mythical beast, who somehow started thier musical education with Peel (rather than the more likely Powell, or Lamacq, or Jensen, or Long - would anyone start their musical journey with Bogshed and Anal Cunt - that'd be like trying to discover classical through Harrison Birtwistle), managed to miss Chris Morris when he was on in early evening and yet found him late at night, and... well, I don't believe anyone who actually would be going out with friends would have taped Danny Rampling. And even if we know what they're trying to get at - people who've grown up with the station - these are exactly the people who Radio One are trying to shake off; it's precisely the reason why broad appeal presenters like Mark and Lard are being replaced with the the stealing-traffic-cone-tastic Colin and Edith. And it's for Colin and Edith that the Times are here. Mainly Colin, actually, who has a bit of a gob on him:

“I love it when people say Radio 2 is the new Radio 1.” His words spill rapidly from his mouth. “Have you listened to it? It’s not for people our age. To me, Jonathan Ross is an embarrassing dad. And it’s people our age who are listening to iPods and using the internet and downloading Green Day online. Obviously, stations for people over 40 are getting bigger, and stations for younger people are struggling. But the financial agenda behind the attacks on Radio 1 is huge. One out of two kids aged between 16 and 24 listens to Radio 1, and does so in an advertising-free environment that isn’t about the latest trainers you own, or taking a slice of the door of the gigs we recommend.”

"people our age" - by which we take it he means people a bit younger than him, and a fair bit younger than Edith - may well be the only people downloading Green Day online, but we're sure that iPods are more widely owned amongst the Radio 2 audience, who can afford them, than the Radio 1 audience, and his ridiculous suggestion that nobody over thirty uses the internet is the babbling of a man who clearly wouldn't recognise his own arse if it was served up with peas and chips. His defence of an advertising free Radio One would be admirable, if it wasn't for the - ahem - One Big Weekend and One Live in Londonderry type events: they're not the same as yer basic XFM presents, straightforward affairs, but it's still an operation in a commercial realm. We don't think that's wrong, but we would expect a Radio 1 presenter to be aware of them.

Then Edith cuts in with an attack on people who wish it was still Mark and Lard in their slot (i.e. everybody over the age of three):

"I so do not take any notice whatsoever. The people who are slagging us off probably all wanted to be Radio 1 DJs anyway.”
Murray snorts: “The Mark and Lard listeners we’re receiving e-mails and texts from, who don’t like us, are closer to their pensions than to their 18th birthday. And throughout the history of Radio 1, the people who are always complaining are the people who are just getting ready to leave for Radio 2. The point is, they no longer identify with youth culture. The young Mark and Lard listeners have all been welcoming.”

All of them? Isn't it a bit unfortuante though, that the younger Mark and Lard fans will be the ones who, Colin, listen to the internet and will be trooping off to 6Music as fast as their mice and Real Player 10 downloads can carry them. The point is, of course, not that people don't like you and Edith because they're older than you; it's because you're just not as good. It's wrong to say that people who complain are the ones who "no longer identify with youth culture." Sometimes the complaints are valid - like when Joe Mace is given a show, or when Emma Forbes was handed lunchtime for no apparent reason. Or when Colin Murray was wedged onto the Evening Session. The problem with people who've seen a lot of youth culture is not that they're old, Colin. It's that they can recognise a dud when they hear one.

[Thanks to the other Simon, the It's Up For Grabs one, for pointing us onto this]

NEXT WEEK: FREDDY FORSYTH - THE REAL FIGURE BEHIND KURT'S DEATH?: We really, really hope that this is a joke: Otherwise, Steve Lightfoot really does believe that Stephen King killed John Lennon. For, uh, some reason. [Tipping our hat with our cane and offering thanks to Rufus for this.]

BUT TO HIM, SHE WAS STRICTLY MILK, COFFEE OR TEA: Were it not for the fact they would have been just a potential deep inside their grandad's sctrotums when it aired, we'd swear that Busted's new single 'Air Hostess' is little more than a thinly disguised reworking of the old B Cal ad. Although, admittedly, the British Caledonian "I wish they all could be Caledonian Girls" jingle itself was just California Girls with some new lyrics slapped on the top.

SINGING CEREAL: We almost wish we were Canadian sometimes, you know. Not only because they're getting berry-themed Cheerios, but some lucky Canadian is going to be the voice of the cereal. We were at this point going to list some artists who started out singing cornflake ad jingles, but the best we could come up with was Michael Portillo in a Ribena advert, and Petra Roddis from The Charlottes being the model on the front of the milk version of Soda Stream. In Germany. But we're sure it'll be a fine stepping stone. Ian Botham? Although he'd not done the Shredded Wheat adverts before he was involved in We Are The Bunnberrys, had he?

WHAT THE POP PAPERS SAY: Kurt's still dead - but Morrissey isn't - edition
Billie Holiday is making a comeback - obviously not an actual one, although it is Easter, and so everything is possible. But her career is up for one of those periodic reinventions, as what the New Statesman calls “a new generation of artists” bring her work into a new context. Well, they say “a new generation of artists”, but it’s neither Amy Winehouse or Jamie Callum who offer any interesting comment on their newly discovered heroine: Cullum sounds like an estate agent showing us around her artistry: “her readings of many standards have become the definitive ones, and the aga is still under guarantee”, while Winehouse blusters like a fourth grader caught unprepared in her book review: “Her range of skills are vast and mostly overlooked.” No, it’s former Chancellor Kenneth Clarke who manages to sound like an enthusiast - like someone for whom music means more than what they do at the office. There’s something of the true fan in his careful decision that “Billie is my favourite jazz singer, slightly edging out Bessie Smith.” No wonder the Tories fucked the economy - Clarke clearly was spending his nights drawing up lists of the ten best jazz standards about the weather, and the ten most ill-fated collaborations.

We try to avoid mentioning the Radio Times letters page much - indeed, we often try and replicate that spell that Willow did when she tried to make everyone forget that she and Tara had had a big row, hoping it will allow us to live in a world where nobody has a recollection that Gill Hudson ever bothers compiling a bunch of letters into the sort of ill-tempered, pedantic whinefest which would make the editors of a freesheet feel ashamed. However, there’s actually a letter making quite a good point this week - that without Mark and Lard, Radio One is going to be even more tightly focused on it’s 15-34 demographic mission (and closer to the youth end at that) and a lot of people who otherwise would have heard some of this modern pop will be completely divorced from the delights of the Radio One playlist. Hudson, of course, misses the point, trilling that Lard’s on 6 and Mark is on Radio 2. Perhaps she was just so thrown by a letter that wasn’t moaning like a wanker in a porn cinema that she paniced. Elsewhere, it’s business as usual, with someone complaining that Pete Townshend featured in the programme about police catching paedophiles - this was, apparently, “gratuitious villification of a good man by association and innuendo.” Which is odd: we could have sworn that it was actual footage of a man who used a credit card to buy child porn, admitted using his credit card to buy child porn, accepted a police caution for using his credit card to buy child porn, and signed the Sexual Offenders Register as a result of using his credit card to buy child porn.

The NME is headlined “Special Commemorative Issue” - No, really, I know it’s a big day in the paper’s history but - this is just too... oh, it’s commeroration of Kurt’s death? Oh. The masthead is made from flowers; it’s quite sweet.

The paper has its findings from its online poll about file-sharing. Although it has to be stressed the poll was an online survey of self-selecting respondents, the figures are still grim reading for the BPI: 85% of people don’t think downloading harms artists; 89% say downloading doesn’t stop them buying music; only 6% saying the BPI’s bullying tactics will stop them from downloading in the future. The NME then runs off to see Matt Phillips, from the BPI. He’s wearing a tshirt, see, because he’s down with the kids. Or maybe he can’t wear a suit because of his forked tail, we’re not sure. Older NME readers will recall when Thrills used to run a feature written by The Man. This week, he’s back, and his name is Matt Phillips. How does he feel about the 12 year old getting sued in the States? It’s a good thing - it brings the message home to parents that they could get sued for what their kids are doing. (Actually, they can’t.) Asked if he’s worried that the BPI are putting a barrier between the Industry and the Music, the Man don’t give a fuck: “people don’t see it as stealing” he trots out, which isn’t answering the question at all. We wonder if the BPI are all like this: “Hello, love, would you like chips or roast potatoes today?” “If people continue to download, there will be no potatoes.” But Matt’s keen to stress that we must pay for our downloads, because without it, the industry would have no money: “the cost [of a CD] is funding the artist, recording the album, paying me to speak to you.” Yes, kids, if you carry on downloading, there’s a very real risk there will be no more BPI to lecture us. A horriffying prospect - at a stroke, that right clicking and “Save as’ dialogue box might as well read ‘Put all the people working in the BPI out of work.’ Have that picture in your mind. And now go and get Bittorrent.

Michael Eavis or Glastonbury or someone says the Glasto ticket debacle will never happen again - every Glastonbury promises the last of something: last itched battle with police; last pillaging of Pilton village; last time Ian McCulloch will be allowed to wear white trousers...

In an extraordinary week, something totally unexpected. A Morrissey interview. In the NME. Actually with the NME. For real. (Unless it was Mike Joyce putting on a silly voice and pretending, but there’s no bit about how “the other guys in the Smiths were the best”, so we’re thinking its genuine.) The only downside is some of the new lyrics are so ropey, you could pull a car out a swamp with them - “where the president is never black, female or gay/and until that day you’ve got nothing to say to me...” Pity Billie Holiday’s dead, then. More Mozzer next week, when he’s even - for the zillionth time - on the cover.

Method Man don’t do karaoke. In fact, he tries to kid Peter Robinson that he doesn’t even know for sure karaoke bars exist. Yeah, right.

Durrty Doogz - that’s two ‘r’s, and two ‘o’s. And a z. And... oh, it’s just mispelled. They’re new, and they’re grime, this month’s short lived new genre.

So, that Kurt pull-out memorial in brief: “this issue is for Kurt... 60 of the aspirin-sized Rohypnol pills... grimly awaited news... assassination of JFK... I was backstage at a Wonderstuff gig... Sylvia Plath... he was lactating... inspired me to check out Deep Purple.” One highlight is then-NME editor Steve Sutherland recalling the way the paper dealt with the news - tellingly, “no-one was surprised”; and how it booted Primal Scream from the cover. “It feels like Kurt’s depression is dragging NME and all its readers down with him. But on page 40 [this is the second issue, with the Courtney cover] there’s a review of Parklife...”; another highspot is a glossy reprint of some of the artwork from Godspeed, the Cobain picture book. The phrase “collector’s edition” is thrown around really easily in the magazine world these days, often signalling nothing more than two different Hollyoaks girls in their knickers on the cover, but this really does feel like something you’ll be putting to one side for the grandchildren.

reviews
live
snow patrol - befast mandela hall - “the bands new material outstrips the old by a long way”, 9
shellac (how odd that albini pops up in the cobain edition) - kings cross scala - “endearingly unpleasant”, 8

albums - is it just me, or do the albums reviewers at the nme seem so much (cough, cough) brighter and dazzling this week?
young heart attack - mouthful of love - “stuffed to the gussets with guitars which sound like laughing kazoos”, 8
tears for fears - everybody loves a happy ending - “MAKE IT MORE LIKE GARY!”, 2
xiu xiu - fabulous muscles - “MBV colliding with Interpol”, 7

singles
sotw - the beta band - assessment - “it’s a joy to have them back”
amplifier - drowned in neon - “sounding fucking mighty these days”

and, finally: we guess it had to be Nirvana in the ‘Why I Love’ column this week; and the band have chosen to explain their love of Jo Wylie. Oh, alright, the other way round. But we’d quite like to see Dave Grohl talking about Jo: “Her way of presenting television without wearing shoes was quite unlike anything we’d ever seen before...”

OF COURSE, THE 'LOOKALIKE' IS THE 'LAZY COMEDY SLAG' OF THE BLOGGING WORLD, THE DASHED-OFF, HALF-ASSED COVER VERSION: But nevertheless... Television's funny man Stewart Lee. Television funny-looking man Will Young. But which is which?

THE OLD BLADDER: Is it just us, or does everyone find that when trying to picture The Darkness playing in a Soccer Six tournament, they always see Billy The Fish in goal?

THE OLD BLADDER: Is it just us, or does everyone find that when trying to picture The Darkness olaying in a Soccer Six tournament, they always see Billy The Fish in goal?

OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES AND H FROM STEPS: For some reason, the slightly dim-looking one out of Steps hasn't taken the chance to shake off the stupid nickname H, and is still answering to it, like a fairly well-trained labrador. He's currently taking time out from a very cheesy - ahem, busy - schedule to do webchats with Sun Readers (the phrase "a meeting of minds" would be apt, if sounding a little bit mocking). It's quite revealing, but for for the reasons H would like to think. The words are his, the emphasis is ours:

Working in theatre is a different experience for me - I'm used to performing in arenas and on TV with in-ear monitors so it's strange to be singing live...

There's been a complete cast change since I joined the show which is nice because it means I haven't started on my own and been made to feel like the new guy...

Claire wants to be Celine Dion...

Being a role model was not something I consciously worried about during my time in Steps...

[An emailer asks 'If you could be in the Big Brother house with absolutely any celebs, dead or alive, who would you choose?]

I'd choose Jennifer Saunders and Rusty (sic) Lee - a TV chef who no-one remembers but who I found hilarious. I would also ask Paul O'Grady (Lily Savage) and Claire Sweeney - who are both good friends of mine - along and maybe the Krankies so I could have two for the price of one! I have been asked to do Celebrity Big Brother before but I've always been too busy. Shows like Big Brother and I'm A Celebrity are only really good for people who want to be famous - that isn't me, I love what I do and fame is just a by-product of that!

Well, judging by the way single sales for H and Claire's stuff tanked, it's not much of a by-product; like the amount of radiaton given out by those old alarm clocks, we'd estimate.

WE'RE DREAMING OF MEL C AND MARK OWEN MERGING THEIR LABELS, LIKE A LATTERDAY UNITED ARTISTS: As Mel prepares to cut the middlemen out of her daily affairs and go it alone (okay, there aren't that many middlemen who were looking to get involved with a new Melanie Chisholm album), she's announced some "intimate" (i.e. small) dates (i.e. at least they'll probably sell out), mostly at Barfly venues this June: 12 - Glasgow Barfly; 13 - York Fibbers; 14 - Liverpool Loft; 16 - Cardiff Barfly; 17 - London Barfly. It's a whopping great fourteen quid to get in, mind, answering the question of how she'll be funding releasing her own music.

OOH, OUR INDUSTRY IS IN POOR SHAPE: The latest set of global music sales figures have been released by the IFPI, which is the RIAA pretending it listens to what Guatemala thinks. But even the IFPI has trouble with the party line, admitting that much of the decline in world sales (seven per cent) is down to competiton from other media and poor economic conditions as much as the old bugaboo Piracy and those damn kids with their damn computers; and they have to concede that the market is showing signs of recovery in some of the key markets. They don't, however, bother to mention that the seven per cent drop is in the value of sales, and not in the actual number of records being sold.

LIFE IN THE CITY OF CULTURE: Despite bleeding the Beatles bucket dry as a stone, it seems Liverpool City Council still haven't got a clue about how to treat their heritage - they're planning to bulldoze Ringo Starr's birthplace. Maybe the city should decide if it really is Beatlesville, land of yellow submarines and magical mystery tours, or if it's not really that arsed about the Beatles at all. At the moment, Ringo House, 9, Madryn Street, is something of a tourist attraction, bringing thousands of visitors into an area without much to tempt visitors. Rather than deciding to try and make this the focus of regeneration for the area, the council seems set on pulling the whole street down. What makes it worse is the residents of Madryn Street would much rather have their homes tarted up than torn down. But, of course, actually keeping the original building would sit poorly with the council's current policies of turning everything into a one-step removed 'experience' - doubtless plans are already underway to build a Ringoesque House Visitor Attraction in the city centre. Just as soon as the European Union decide to pay for it.

WHAT'S WORSE THAN BEING SACKED ON TV?: Being sacked by Sugar Ray on TV. The latest bright idea for the never-ending mish-mash of reality TV is 'The Apprentice' meets 'Pop Idol', as Spike TV in the US persuades eight stooges to follow Sugar Ray on tour while competing, Big Brother style, for a "job" in the music industry. Oh, and a Kia Sedan for some reason. Don't knock it, this is exactly how Mitch Bainwol started out at the RIAA, more or less. Although he found a golden ticket in a packet of Chuppa Chups or something.

YOU CAN TAKE THE 'RADIO 2 IS COOL' THING A LITTLE TOO FAR: Radio 2 have just announced that Brad Pitt is joining their line-up of presenters - he's presenting a tribute to Nick Drake on Saturday 22nd May at 9.00. Uma Thurman is mulling an offer to sit in for Sarah Kennedy over the summer.

ON HIS OWEN AND ALL ALONE: Normally, we're hard-hearted and laugh when we hear of an artist being dropped, but the news that Mark Owen's been dumped by Island made us sniff a little. But, being the plucky soul he is, he's picked himself up, dusted himself down, and is now going to go it alone. Hurrah!

BLIMEY... YOU'RE STILL GOING, THEN?: We're surprised to hear that Alex Parks is still going around writing songs for her second album. The Fame Academy winner has, apparently, been in Los Angeles - in America, USA - with "famous songwriters", no less. She's written fifty songs, but that doesn't seem to be enough for the album, which suggests they might just not be very good. And who's the smooth talking PR doing their best to keep Alex in the public eye? Her mam. Bless.

A LOCAL FESTIVAL FOR LOCAL PEOPLE: In a bid to try and stem the flow of bad publicity, Glastonbury has released a bunch of tickets for 'local' people. Seemingly running contrary to the 'only with a debit card, limit of two', the local tickets are being offered through Glastonbury Tourist Information Centre (9 High Street, Glastonbury, Somerset, BA6 9DP), with people being invited to send a "postcard only" to be in the application process for a "limited" number of tickets. Local is being defined as living in the following postcode areas: BA3, BA4, BA5, BA6, BA7, BA9, BA10, BA11, BA16, BS26, BS27, BS28, TA6, TA7, TA9, TA10, TA11 and TA12. We'd imagine a lot of long-forgotten Great Aunts in Somerset are going to be getting surprise visits soon.

I AM TRYING TO SLAKE MY PARTAKING: It's apparently not going to mess with the scheduled tour later this month, but Wilco's Jeff Tweedy has checked himself into rehab to try and shake off an addiction to painkillers. Tweedy's apparently been self-medicating, and then medicating for a couple of imaginary friends on top, for a couple of years, since being plagued with migraines. The label has shunted the new album back until June to give Tweedy a chance to empty his life of the sad routine of counting out the blister packs.

SEE THAT PUNK? THAT WAS MY... UM, OUR IDEA: Now that the chances of a Ramones reunion seems to have become totally unlikely, Marky Ramone has taken the Alistair Campbell route, touring the world with a one-man show, claiming the whole idea for punk was the Ramones', and the Ramones' alone. if you're in Cardiff, you can catch him tomorrow, but he's doing a full UK tour at the moment. The idea is to scrape together enough cash to buy a ticket home ("it's amazing to see all the older fans and friends mingling with the younger fans. They're the reason I continue touring") and to keep the Ramone flame alive. Mark's loving the genuflection the band get now: "Yes we are commercial, the Ramones are everywhere and that's good because we've always wanted more people to hear our music, and more bands influenced by it." And we'd guess the regular checks from the businesses using Ramones in their ads isn't entirely unwelcome, either. Altogether now: "the Bird's Eye Chicken's the word..."

MORE ON THE 10th ANNIVERSARY: Thanks to Mark for bringing the Canoe piece to our attention, and to Alan at Popwherry who provides an impressively full listing of a lot of the Cobain eulogising from the day itself. Amongst our favourite items was BBC News Online's story of Kurt in pictures - I don't think Ladybird have yet produced a 'All About Nirvana' book, but this would be pretty much what it would be like. Blogcritics, of course, had its usual mixture of views, including the observation thatKurt made a poor excuse for an icon - an opinion fatally undermined by the suggestion that, erm, Terence Trent D'arby outscored Nirvana on the creativity front. Of course that's just a goad, but we reckon that D'arby and Love might have made a better couple than Kurt and Courtney - both share a love of public nudity (they're the only two artists to have appeared naked on the front of Q magazine) and both haven't made a decent record for several years.

Talking of Courtney - and boy, do we spend a lot of time doing that these days - it's odd reading her eulogy to Kurt with the benefit of ten years of hindsight; what in 1994 came across as grief now seems a lot more like grandstanding. In some ways, it's like the rock and roll equivalent of Earl Spencer's words at Diana's funeral: move on a few years and what you took to be delivered from the heart starts to sound very much like playing up to the gallery.

Radio One's Kurt and Me documentary is still available through the Listen Again feature, if you've half an hour to spare.

Two final thoughts: First, amongst all the megabytes added to the digital world about Kurt, probably the most perceptive comment was the observation in passing that "Kurt would have hated all this" - of all the second guessing about what might have been and what might have been said and what might have been felt, that probably feels about the most likely.

Second: also ten years ago this week, this happened. Remember Kurt, but set him against the scale of human suffering in Rwanda:

"Our men were ready to fight, even though they didn't have any weapons, so they died standing. You would not think that they were all going to get killed because they were very many. We did not think they would get killed.
My neighbour Gitera was there. Imagine someone leaving their home, knowing the possible victim's name and their children's names.
They all killed their neighbours' wives and children.
All the people they were cutting fell on me because I was near the door. I had too much hair but it all was washed with blood.
My body had been drenched in blood and it was getting dry on me so killers thought I had been cut all over. They thought I was dead."

MORE ON THE 10th ANNIVERSARY: Thanks to Mark for bringing the Canoe piece to our attention, and to Alan at Popwherry who provides an impressively full listing of a lot of the Cobain eulogising from the day itself. Amongst our favourite items was BBC News Online's story of Kurt in pictures - I don't think Ladybird have yet produced a 'All About Nirvana' book, but this would be pretty much what it would be like. Blogcritics, of course, had its usual mixture of views, including the observation thatKurt made a poor excuse for an icon - an opinion fatally undermined by the suggestion that, erm, Terence Trent D'arby outscored Nirvana on the creativity front. Of course that's just a goad, but we reckon that D'arby and Love might have made a better couple than Kurt and Courtney - both share a love of public nudity (they're the only two artists to have appeared naked on the front of Q magazine) and both haven't made a decent record for several years.

Talking of Courtney - and boy, do we spend a lot of time doing that these days - it's odd reading her eulogy to Kurt with the benefit of ten years of hindsight; what in 1994 came across as grief now seems a lot more like grandstanding. In some ways, it's like the rock and roll equivalent of Earl Spencer's words at Diana's funeral: move on a few years and what you took to be delivered from the heart starts to sound very much like playing up to the gallery.

Two final thoughts: First, amongst all the megabytes added to the digital world about Kurt, probably the most perceptive comment was the observation in passing that "Kurt would have hated all this" - of all the second guessing about what might have been and what might have been said and what might have been felt, that probably feels about the most likely.

Second: also ten years ago this week, this happened. Remember Kurt, but set him against the scale of human suffering in Rwanda:

"Our men were ready to fight, even though they didn't have any weapons, so they died standing. You would not think that they were all going to get killed because they were very many. We did not think they would get killed.
My neighbour Gitera was there. Imagine someone leaving their home, knowing the possible victim's name and their children's names.
They all killed their neighbours' wives and children.
All the people they were cutting fell on me because I was near the door. I had too much hair but it all was washed with blood.
My body had been drenched in blood and it was getting dry on me so killers thought I had been cut all over. They thought I was dead.

YOU KNOW YOUR MARRIAGE IS IN TROUBLE WHEN...: ...this David Beckham Photographed With His Wife - is considered a newsworthy headline

HANDY: It's great news that J-Lo's mum has won USD2.4million on some sort of casino game - she might be able to help her daughter out with a few bob. Recently, Jennifer Lopez has become so short of money she's had no choice but to accept any humiliating offer which comes her way, from appearing in Gigli to recording 'Baby I Love You', in a desperate bid to keep body and soul together and pay off the caterers she'd hired for her wedding to Ben Affleck ("I'm very sorry you've split up, love, but I've got a fridge full of individual pizzas and we've had the work experience lad sticking pineapple and cheese on cocktail sticks for the best part of a week, so someone's got to pay...")