GIVE ME BACK MY HEART: Is it just us, or does this interview with Harriet Scott and Jono Coleman sound like less than a ringing endorsement of Heart FM's music policy?

"I love it," says Scott. "I'd been at Virgin for four years wanting to slit my wrists to the Manic Street Preachers, and then I came here and I thought it was hilarious that you could get paid for sitting there and playing Chic and Abba. The music has changed, even from when I joined the station. We're a lot more trendy now and we'll play Outkast and Jamelia."

Jono is slightly less enthusiastic. "We work in commercial radio, so people want to hear their favourite songs. Because we hear them every day we might get fed up with this Anastasia song or that song from Will Young, but you have to remove yourself and say, 'I'm playing this for Helen and Steve - it's their favourite song, it's their anniversary today.' "

The same piece also explains who Century FM's ficitional target audience is:

Debbie, a name arrived at by looking back at statistics to discover the most popular name for baby girls 33 years ago, is married with two kids. Her husband spends his weekends watching football, while she watches soap operas and Sex and the City. She likes to keep in touch with current musical trends, while also reliving the disco hits of her 1980s youth.

... wants to keep in touch with current musical trends, and yet inexplicably listens to Century. That's like wanting to keep up to date with the news and tuning in to ITV.

MORE POP STARS HEADING FOR POWER: While Midnight Oil's Peter considers if he can throw his lot in with Australia's Labor Party, in Japan Shoukichi Kina has declared his candidacy for the Upper House on the Democratic Party ticket. He's called "The Bob Dylan of Japan" but looks a little more like the Tom Jones of Tokyo to us; amongst his policies are the replacement of weapons with musical instruments - a crazy idea, which might just work; after all, if you want to repel invaders, having Travis and the Stereophonics playing at the borders is going to be highly effective.

All these pop stars leaping into proper politics. Wonder if it'll happen here? Sit down, Robbie Williams, stay in your seat.

FOLKOBIT: The death has been announced of Eugene Raskin, the folk singer. Raskin's most famous work is an Anglicisation of a Ukranian folk tune, Those Were The Days, which he created for his folk act with his wife, Gene and Francesca. A chance hearing by Paul McCartney lead to the song becoming a hit for Mary Hopkins in 1964. Raskin, who was 94, also found time to be adjunct professort at Columbia for forty years, produce three books on architecture and a handful of plays.

A WORKING DEFINITION OF DESPERATION: Madonna and Britney kissing was a major publicity coup when it happened the first time; to plot its recreation just stinks of desperation. Jeez, at this rate, Madonna'll be being photgraphed again being taken up the ass by Vanilla Ice before the year's out.

THE FALL SPLIT AGAIN: You know the drill by now - Mark E Smith in "not easy to work for" shocker.

THE i IN iTUNES MIGHT NOT STAND FOR INDIES: So it seems that while iTunes is determined to start itself up in Europe tomorrow, talks to bring indie labels into the fold have stalled and so the first few days trading might be missing the likes of Franz Ferdinand, The Pixies, and the White Stripes. Indeed, they could be missing anything up to a quarter of the top selling bands in Britain.

PARTY LIKE ITS 1994: Those of you with memories which stretch back across to a time when Steve Lamacq was one half of a double act and the scars from the loss of the proper Radio Five were still red and bleeding will recall Fierce Panda's habit of sticking out ridiculously well-filled compilation eps with equally ridiculous pun names. Bands like Green Day, Idlewild and Supergrass would turn up on records called stuff like Dope is Important and so on. Well, ten years on, and the Panda have decided its time for a slight return (the Bluetones, now we come to think of it, were amongst those bands) and so on July 5th they're unveiling On The Buzzes (ten years they've taken, to come up with that pun). As you'd expect, it's full of creamy, dreamy goodness:

Razorlight – ‘The Dagger Song (alternate version)’
Ludes ‘She Was Just A Girl’
The Rakes ‘Something Clicked And I Fell Off The Edge’
The Rocks – ‘Celeste’
S.Rock Levinson – ‘Spitting In Italy’
The Souls – ‘Gangsta’

And ten years from now, it'll be worth a fortune on Ebay. Assuming anyone still has record players.

OH, GOD, THEY'RE NOT JOKING: INXS have decided to piss away whatever integrity remained after their short period with Terence Trent D'Arby as lead singer by using a Pop Idol format to find a replacement for Michael Hutchence. The worrying thing is, what if someone attempts to make a British version of this? The closest thing we've got an INXS in the UK is the Blockheads - they've carried on after their leader's demise, with a series of stunt ("guest") front people (even Phil Jupitus at one point), so in that sense they'd be perfect. Let's hope it never happens.

SONY ADMIT THEY'VE BEEN ANTI-SOCIAL, PROMISE NOT TO BE IN FUTURE: The prospect of a Sony music boss being sent down for breach of an anti-social behaviour order has been lifted, as the label have promised to stop flyposting in the UK. Remember to keep your eyes peeled, as I'm sure Sony will welcome any help they can in ensuring they don't make a slip and accidently break their promise.

More amusingly, BMG haven't made the same promise - the summons against their Lucy Handsford has been withdrawn because she's about to leave the company, but Camden Council will merely choose a different name to put in the frame.

STRAIGHTEDGEOBIT: Sean McGrath, former bassist with Saves The Day, lost his battle with cancer on Friday.

Born in New Jersey in 1976, Sean switched from guitar to bass at the age of 14. He carried the bass for Mouthpiece, sXe legends Hands Tied and provided backline support for No Doubt before joining Sefler in 1997. Renamed Saves The Day, the band released two records before Sean moved on - to try alternative comedy, a proper day job and The Alps, who were working on a debut ep at the time of Sean's death.

CAMPBELL GRANTED STAY OF EXECUTION: Well, okay, he's not being executed, but Glen Campbell has had his court appearance for sentencing put back 24 hours, to allow him to fulfill an appointment to perform at the CMA Music Festival in Nashville. He'll now have his porridge handed down to him on Tuesday.

COX POPS ONE OUT: Sara Cox has given birth to a baby girl, Lola Ann, weighing in at 7lbs, 11oz.



It's not known if she intends to bottle feed.

THE REUNION OF THE SNAKES: Although every journalist in the kingdom has got a 'Pete Doherty/Richie Edwards - Tragic Twins' article ready to go in their 'My Documents' folder, remember that being so full of drugs you could give birth in Milton Keynes General and not feel any pain doesn't always have to end in tragedy. As if to prove the point, oh look: The Happy Mondays are doing a reunion gig. Must have been a hefty tax demand this year, then, Shaun?

MY DRUGS BUDDY: We can't actually take the piss out of Lenny Kravitz for keeping a joint he shared with Mick Jagger for a year - although we might snicker that he thought it was a "sign of respect" - because we did keep a bottle of beer in our kitchen for two years because it had been given to us by Mikki from Lush. And also, of course, because we hardly ever cleaned our kitchen in those days.

DOWNLOADS, DOWNLOADS, NOTHING BUT DOWNLOADS: With just twenty four hours to go until iTunes hits the UK, the other legitimate download services are flapping their tailfeathers in a bid to get noticed. OD2 has launched an a la carte service, including a penny-a-play jukebox. Sonic Selecter, which is some sort of horrid plug in for the nasty windows media player, will allow ("from just") 75p downloads from the 350,000 songs OD2 has available, which appear to be free to burn to CD. Oh, and it only works if you're using a Windows PC. Confusingly, there's some sort of claim that "the more tracks people buy the cheaper the unit price becomes", but we're not sure how that works - does it count total downloads by everyone? Or does your own personal price drop on everything as you buy more and more? Or is it the most popular tracks will be cheaper? And can you download so much you get all your music free? We're just not sure.

Meanwhile, Napster - the disappointingly dried-out, cleaned-up, straightened-off husk of the former outlaw service - has issued a press release with the exciting news that it's signed some sort of deal with ntl, the company that probably wishes it had stuck to its original mission of looking after ITV's transmitter network. This will be of no interest to anyone without ntl broadband, which is nearly everybody.

BUMPING AND GRINDS AS HE REPEATS 'BANGKOK': The whole 'flying Pete Doherty to Thailand' plan turns out to have a serious flaw, as Doherty quits the monastery, hails cab to take him to Bangkok. The monks have issued a statement:

Having entered into the free treatment program at Thamkrabok Monastery in Thailand on Thursday June 10, and having vowed to senior Monks "never to take drugs ever again" upon registration, Peter refused to take even his third dose of medication, and has finally today rejected the sensitive and compassionate care offered by the Nuns and the Monks there.

"Despite insistent and concerned appeals from the Monastery’s officials and even his own mother, he demanded his passport and personal belongings and has fled to a hotel in Bangkok.

"Upon leaving the Monastery, Pete signed a declaration stating that: "Thamkrabok Monastery have done everything they could to help me, but I am just not strong enough for this treatment."

In this increasingly saddening and surreal story, June Brown, off Eastenders, has also issued a statement:

"This is a deeply concerning state of affairs. It’s tragic that he has clearly taken the choice to continue using drugs. I am truly concerned for his mother who must be devastated."

And, of course, Thamkrabok has also got a statement on the go, too:

"Thamkrabok can only help those who truly want to help themselves. The Monastery’s success has been built from treating those who want to stop. If they don’t want to stop, nobody can help them. Without a 100% clear intention of wanting to give up, an addict will always continue to use. We hope people learn from this that Thamkrabok is not an easy route – however for people with clear intention Thamkrabok have the tools they need."

ARE THESE FACTS, IN ANY WAY, CONNECTED?: i love fucked up noise buys an ipod; within a fortnight everything sounds uninspiring, lost, distant. I always wondered, to be honest, about the nursery rhyme about the woman with "rings on her fingers and bells on her toes/ she shall have music wherever she goes" - it's one of those things that sounds like a really cool idea but, when you think about it more closely, could actually turn out to be a curse. Like an aural midas touch. Maybe the iPod - all that music, always with you - could be a similar curse. Plus, you lose that age-old stand-by to exit dull pub conversations: "Sorry, but I have to run home as I have an overwhelming urge to hear the Sea Urchins right now."

BEASTIES IN BOXES: More news about EMI, who have, according to the splendid Boing Boing, been forced to include copy protection on the new album, except in the UK and the US. Apparently, Mike D claims the band didn't want the album to have the DRM cuffs on it anywhere, but it's EMI policy and the band "weren't allowed" to deviate from this. It's not clear how hard they tried.

WE CAN DRINK SOME JERRY WINE: A second batch of Jerry Garcia wine has hit the stores, after the first 22,000 cases sold out in thirty days. The Jerry Garcia wine isn't quite as tenuous as the Elvis Presley wine, as at least its sourced from Sonoma County, the place where, um, Garcia dropped out of high school. So it's not just some wine with a label stuck on it at random, okay.

MANUFACTURERS OF SMOKEY SAUCE SAID TO BE WATCHING CASE WITH INTEREST: Smokey Robinson is facing legal action over the slogan he chose for his range of Louisiana foods (no, we didn't know he'd turned himself into a Lloyd Grossman brand, either). Johnnty 'Jambalaya' Percle claims Robinson's The Soul is in the Bowl slogan is to close to the Soul in Yo Bowl trademark he uses for his gumbo. Lawyers for SFGL foods, who make Robinson's frozen gumbo (you haven't eaten yet, have you?), are dismissive, as lawyers tend to be:

"I have not personally had an opportunity to review the complaint yet. It doesn't sound like something that has merit."

But then, you'd hardly expect the lawyers to say "Haven't heard of this one, but, bloody hell, he's got a point, hasn't he."

No Rock advises all its patrons to be very careful when purchasing gumbo until this confusion is cleared up.

THE RELICS OF THE SAINTS: The Saints, one of the touchstone bands of punk, are about to be recorded through a box set collecting everything they ever recorded in their 18 month career.



The band only stuck around for eighteen months, before it was killed off by what mainman Chris Bailey sees as a chain reaction kicked off by a lack of interest by EMI (some things never change):

"It all came down to producing an image to go with the product; what I think happened, EMI lost interest because they thought they were buying one thing and of course they got another; management lost interest because EMI lost interest; the group was very young in a lot of respects, and quite green; there were internal squabbles which there always are amongst children; and Ed Kuepper and I didn't like London very much."

All three studio albums, the live set 'Live in London' and rarities make up the collection, titled 'All Things Through Paradise.' Of course, it's coming out on EMI.

THE RESULTS JUST IN: France beat England in the last minutes due to a final surge of homoeroticism.

HOWEVER SPIRITUAL YOU CLAIM IT IS, SHOWBIZ TAT IS STILL SHOWBIZ TAT: Britney may be coming late to the perfume market (we can expect the stink of her in a bottle later this year, called 'Curious by Britney Spears'), but at least it's a fairly obvious product fit. For the really queasy celeb product tie-in, we give you: Madonna Kabbalah Candles. The Jessica Simpson range of communion wafers is expected Fall 2005.

DON'T BUY FROM EMI: Morrissey has kicked off his Meltdown Fest in trad style - grumbling from the stage. The man whose quiff has growed and growed told acolytes from the stage not to buy the "atrocious quality" DVDs EMI have just released. He also took his shirt off twice - Drowned In Sound is positively man-on-man curious about young Mr. Stephen Patrick's "tanned and toned body." Mmm. Buff.

JAZZOBIT: The death has been announced of John R. T. Davies. Davies, 77, was a member of 60s Jazz band the Temperance Seven and had latterly become recognised as the foremost expert in restoring old jazz recordings. He'd been approached to provide scores for the 'Temps', but took the role of trombonist and alto-saxophonist under the comedy pseudonym Sheikh Wadi El Yadounia. Inevitably, he wore a fez. The band's You're Driving Me Crazy enjoyed a sixteen week run on the charts in 1961, including a spell at what in those days was still called "the top of the shop." The Village Voice's rock critic claimed that the band proved beyond doubt the existence of God.

His career in jazz restoration was aided by an incredible ear for re-using pristine notes from recordings to replace poorly recorded or rendered notes elsewhere on the tapes. He performed this service for some of the biggest names in jazz - including Bessie Smith and Louis Armstrong - but also for more obscure artists on his own Ristick label - the name came from his childhood nickname.

John R. T. Davies (the intials were for Ross Twiston) died on May 25th; he is survived by his wife Sue a daughter and a step-daughter.

THESE THINGS ARE ONLY POSSIBLE THANKS TO THE RIAA COMPANIES INVESTING IN YOUNG TALENT: This week's American charts demonstrate just how keenly the US Music Industry has been taking its supernormal profits, garnered through overcharging for CDs, and investing in new, upcoming acts. The highest new entry on the album chart this week is young Dean Martin, at 28, heading off cheeky whippersnapper Kenny Roger's second highest 39. If it wasn't for the RIAA, youngsters like this just wouldn't get the chance, you know.

DADDY FEELS QUEASY: The Father of all that is Puffery, Sean Combs, quit yesterday's matinee performance of A Raisin In The Sun because the bad boy of rap had a tummy-ache. It's not yet known if he will be feeling well enough to return to the stage today, although his mum has been quoted as saying "if you're well enough to go doing drive-by shootings, you're well enough to go to school, young Sean."

SORRY SEEMS TO BE THE HARDEST WORD: Janet is still fuming with Justin Timberlake over that whole Superbowl thing, apparently (maybe she should have pointed out that she didn't like it during rehearsal?) and doesn't seem totally happy that JuJu has tried to make things better by saying she's "absolutely beautiful" - we can picture Janet's response: "Well, duh, I've spent two million on tucks and pokes and prods, of course I am." Indeed, she seems to be very snippy with Justin now:

"Justin's changed. He's gotten cocky. In a contest between Justin and Usher, Usher would win. Some people can handle success and some people can't. I'm wondering if the latter is the case with Justin."

We're sure this has nothing to do, oh no no, with Justin playing the Bart Simpson "I didn't do it" line and getting away with the stunt while Janet has spent the last half-year trying to persuade the FCC not to carve a letter of shame into her breast, apologising to everybody, trying to act like it was all a surprise and fielding opportunist lawsuits from people claiming the viewed the Superbowl and found their eyes burned out. But we're intrigued by what sort of competition she has in mind between Justin and Usher - naked wrestling in front of a fire? Two rounds of Garden Bird Lotto? Trying to find their own assholes without an assistant to give them hints? We're hoping that Endemol explore the idea for a Justin-Usher olympics. We'd certainly tune in.

THE SHOW MUST GO ON. OH, HANG ON, THERE'S A SOCCER MATCH. LET'S CALL THE WHOLE THING OFF: David Bowie, in an incredible piece of selfish disregard for the people who've paid enormous sums of money to see him, has said he won't go on stage until England v France is over. To be honest, we'd tell him not to bother at all - if he thinks watching some football is more important than playing live, what does that say about how connected he is to the set he's planning to play?

YOU CAN BLOCK THE SOURCE, BUT YOU CAN'T STEM THE FLOW: Eminem has managed to get a judgement against The Source magazine; District Judge Gerard Lynch held the magazine to be in contempt of his earlier ruling banning publication of Marshall's racist rap, and The Source will have to pay Em's legal fees. We're not quite sure why Eminem's going to these extremes - obviously, the lyrics are now pretty easy to find elsewhere on the net (On Eminem.net talk boards, for example) and there's never been any attempt to pretend the lyrics weren't genuine. Eminem has offered an explanation/excuse for them, and thrown himself on the mercy of the wider world. It's up to individuals to decide if "I'd just been dumped by a black girl and it was a long time ago" is enough of get-out; trying to suppress the words from appearing in public makes it look like Em doesn't quite have the confidence that it is.