Who wrote on Bryan Adam's guitar?

Bryan Adams is cross, because when he picked up his guitar after arriving in Egypt, it has been defaced:

Airport customs graffiti on my 1957 Martin D-18 from Egypt. Back to the luthier... #bryanadamsgetup

A photo posted by @bryanadams on Mar 10, 2016 at 2:59pm PST

Customs say it wasn't them:

A customs official said instruments were marked with serial numbers, although usually with stickers. Regarding the ink, he suggested: “Maybe it wasn’t us?”

It was also unlikely to be music lovers, who would have smashed the guitar to pieces.

Wall Street Journal struggles with obscure lyrics

There are some songs whose lyrics are cryptic - who is the Walrus? Why is the bustle in the hedgerow? Why did Nik Kershaw release The Riddle in the first place?

And here's one The Wall Street Journal is puzzling over:

What was the song "Summer of '69″ all about? @bryanadams on music, photography and his career: on.wsj.com/11kV48J

— Wall Street Journal (@WSJ) November 30, 2012

Oh, yes, the mystery of that song.

"It's not really about the year 1969" reveals Bryan, just in case there's anyone alive on the planet who might not have spotted that within about three seconds.

Everything he does, he does for Georgia

Although it's perhaps diverting that Bryan Adams' gig in Tiblisi was sponsored by a Russian mining company - a curious choice for an event calling for peace for Georgia - you've still got to give Adams credit. Not too many celebrities are queuing up to visit nations with Russian tanks gathering on the fringes at the moment.

Darkness at 3AM: Knives and drugs

We're puzzled - when 3AM first reported the meeting between Noel Gallagher and Jeff Conaway, it was clearly just a little bit of backstage mucking about.

Today, though, it's been upgraded to "the showbiz fight of the year". Oh, and it's over:

Trying to stir up more trouble, Russell Brand invited Noel on his radio show and surprised him with a phone call to Kenickie.

But Jeff told Noel: "You need protection growing up in New York.

You need some kind of weapon. There are very dangerous characters on the subway."

Well, yes, there are dangerous characters on the subway - mostly broken down ex-actors waving knives around.

We love that the Mirror team are running this story on Wednesday - doesn't Russell Brand's show go out on Saturdays?

Meanwhile, Bryan Adams has written a song for Amy Winehouse. Apparently:

With lyrics such as, "Amid the stars and the bars, the pimps and pills" and "the picture faded and the day was done, went home to nothin' but a loaded gun," it's clear Bryan, 48, fears for Amy.

Or, possibly, for Phil Spector.

Adams has a witty retort prepared

Fan to Ryan Adams, during last night's Cardinals gig: I can't see your face
Ryan Adams, holding up lighter: Go and see Coldplay instead.

Okay, it's not that witty, but at least the fan got off better than the guys he threw out for yelling for Bryan Adams songs.

Gordon in the morning: Amy in a cardie

With the news of Britney's, um, friendship being handled by the Sun's American editor, Bizarre is left this morning leading with the news that Amy Winehouse put a cardigan on to keep warm.

Still, her festive spell at Bryan Adams house allows Gordon a spot of muted crowing:

The troubled Rehab star had been staying with singer-turned-photographer BRYAN ADAMS over Christmas and New Year — just as The Sun said she would.

Amusingly, Smart is having to say "as The Sun" rather than "just as I said" because, of course, that story was delivered by Pete Samson. And Gordon has seemingly forgotten that the Sun also insisted that Mick Jagger would be sharing Christmas with the pair.

Even more odd: Smart makes no mention of the presence of George Roberts, Winehouse's ex-boyfriend. Surely - in the context of her devotion to Blake - that's a more interesting story?

First Mel C - now Amy Winehouse

Good news for the Bizarre team this morning - they've landed a story in the second slot on the Sun website, with the arrant wasp toss that Amy Winehouse "might" spend Christmas with Bryan Adams. Oh, and Mick Jagger.

Apparently Adams - who had a thing for Diana Spencer, we recall, and look how that turned out - has suggested a trip to Mustique. And when the paper says Mick will be there too, that turns out to be an extrapolation from Jagger having a hiding from the taxman in a house on the island.

The whole thing is sourced to a "friend" of Amy Winehouse, who may well have heard from Amy that she's off to spend Christmas with Bryan Adams. But the state Winehouse is in now she may also believe she's going to fly to The Philippines with Victoria Adams. Or the moon with Grizzly Adams.

All they are saying is give us some peace

Plans for a peace-themed pair of concerts in Tel Aviv and Jericho have been scrapped after complaints the organisers had avoided incorporating many key Palestinian demands into the concert's aims. And also that they insisted on having Bryan Adams on the bill.

Actually, we're not quite sure how the concerts were supposed to work:

Rocker Bryan Adams was due to headline two concerts held simultaneously in Tel Aviv, Israel, and the West Bank town of Jericho on 18 October.

How was he going to headline two gigs simultaneously, exactly?

Diana concert loses ex-lovers

While the decision to bar anyone who may or may not have had sex with Diana from her memorial concert does at least mean we'll be spared James Hewitt on washboard, for a concert supposedly desperate for people to take part closing down the potential pool might not be such a good idea.

For a start, it rules out Bryan Adams. A courtier has leaked:

"The princes have nothing against Bryan Adams, but they want the concerts to be free from any innuendo or tittle-tattle. It was decided that it would be inappropriate for Adams to appear."

The Kaiser Chiefs have suggested that nobody who didn't know her should not play. Now the Princes are insisting that anybody who knew her shouldn't. It's just going to be ninety minutes of Elton John, isn't it?

Irritate Ryan - win big cash prizes

We're not sure that Robbie Fulks has really seen Ryan Adam's ejection of a fan as the good-humoured jape we take it to be (certainly, he's done it three or four times already, apparently); but if Adams is as touchy as he seems to think about the Bryan-Ryan jokes, Fulk's offer of merchandise rewards to anyone who disrupts Ryan's shows with calls for songs by his homonymical Canadian cousin may yet blow up in his face. Robbie should brace himself for any number of attempts to cash in...

(getting an 'additional reporting by' credit - morag)