Gordon in the morning: Cole's terror at, er, zero feet

Gordon leads today with a massive splash about Cheryl Cole's flight horror horror shock shock horror:

Cheryl Cole’s storm terror on private jet

The "storm terror"? Er... there was some lightning quite near her plane. Before it took off.

The bad weather was right over the grounded private jet and lightning struck the runway just a few metres from the plane.

Coming tomorrow: Sugababes experience nightmare as captain warns of turbulence and switches the seatbelt sign on.

[Cheryl Cole] said: “We were stuck in the plane and just sitting on the runway and a bright massive flash of light hit outside the aircraft. I said to my friend, ‘That’s lightning’ — then it just didn’t stop.

“I was so scared that I thought, ‘This is it. I’ve got an album to promote and I’ve got so much yet to do!’”

Yes, imagine all the lip-syncing and polite replies to inane questions the world would have missed out on.

Cheryl Cole might have taken comfort in the knowledge that lightning strikes on planes are common, but actual accidents as a result incredibly rare - a commercial plane won't get through a year without being hit by lightning. Instead, she reached deep inside herself:

“But I remembered I’d climbed Kilimanjaro, so took a bit of strength from that.”

Yes. If a lightning strike did manage to knock out the electrical system of my plane, sending it hurtling to the ground, having climbed a mountain is even better than adopting the brace position.

Glastonbury 2011: What's the weather going to be for the Glastonbury Festival?

According to weather.com, it looks like it's going to be another disappointingly dry Glastonbury this year. (Disappointing from the perspective of those of us watching it at home - where's the fun if the audience aren't crotch deep in mud?)

From Tuesday through to Saturday, the prediction is for a mixture of sun and cloud, with some showers on Sunday. Temperatures will be a slightly fresh 14 Celsius on Saturday.

Somewhat incongruously, you can find Worthy Farm on the Zoopla property website. There can't be many house listings with that sort of photo on their page...

Glasgow: Weather axes gigs

Thin night in Glasgow tonight: Billy Bragg and Emarosa have cancelled their dates.

Good news, though - there are tickets on the door for Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - but there'll be no Duke Spirit.

Rush fans seek refunds

Last Wednesday, Rush cancelled a gig in Chicago because of heavy rain. A shame, perhaps, but there you are.

Oh... unless you're Christopher Langone. He's annoyed that the band didn't adopt a show-must-go-on approach, and has launched a lawsuit:

The lawsuit states: "After the announcement of cancellation, rain was not significant in Chicago. For example, the Chicago White Sox completed a game in the weather in Chicago on the evening of July 7, 2010."

Langone tells the Chicago Sun-Times, "I travelled here to Chicago to see the show with old friends. I've been a lifelong fan of Rush and we were very disappointed they cancelled the show...especially when (the rain) stopped."

'I'm such a lifelong fan of the band, they decided to not play in the pouring rain once, and I slap them with a lawsuit. That's the extent of my fandom.'

It's not clear if the baseball match he cites in his lawsuit was being played with electric bats, or if Langone doesn't quite understand the difference between standing on a stage surrounded by electrical equipment and playing sports. Nor the difference between an open air gig, and a sporting event, the latter of which have most of the fans under cover. It's also not entirely obvious why Langone is especially pissed off that they cancelled and then it stopped raining, as if he'd rather they left it right to the last minute to pull the gig, thereby ensuring even local people would have set out on their journeys before it was called off.

All Points West on hold

Bubbling around in Twitterstreams right now: All Points West have postponed their gate opening for today, blaming bad weather. They don't yet seem to have finished working through their plan B, though.

And you will know us by the hail on head...

The Jelly NYC Pool Party came to a sudden halt yesterday when heavy storms swept in. Trail Of Dead fled the stage, although given it was a pool party it's hard to see why some more rain would constitute a serious problem.

Oh. The lightning. Yes, that might be risky.

Glastonbury 2009: Boom!

Schadenfreude has started a day early at Glastonbury - or rather, not at Glastonbury - as thunder storms are ravaging the site.

Glastonbury 2009: BBC Weather at 10.35 ends on an ominous note

"If you're in Glastonbury, I'm sure you've taken wellingtons... haven't you?"

Last FM meltsdown

So hot was it in London yesterday, Last FM went in to meltdown as it servers struggled to cope with the heat.

Techcrunch are reporting that the heat wasn't generated by the weather, but instead caused by pants on fire amongst executives; they say they've got a source and everything.

Brothers, it's time to revolt. Oh, hang on, it's a bit nippy.

The attempt to try and form a union of musicians to represent their interests ran aground because of the snow. You know, we must all stand up and be counted, but... well, it's chilly out there.

The main aim of the Featured Artists Coalition is to try and force labels to share more of what we shall call the digital dividend with them, which seems a good idea. One that, you know, you might think they should have thought about when they were negotiating their last contracts.

Still, it snowed a little, so the record companies will live to fight another day.

[Thanks to Michael M]

Bestival battered by blustery blows

Bestival has been suffering an almost Glastonbury-like weather battering: the BBC Introducing stage has had to be axed in the face of storms.

Rob Da Bank is confident everything will turn out alright:

"Obviously people are going to moan about the rain but but I've been to enough muddy Glastonburys to know that things always come good in the end. I've had loads of people come up to me and say this is actually the best Bestival they've ever been to. Onwards and upwards!"

Bestival attempts to capture the original spirit of Glastonbury; Da Bank is even chanelling the insane optimism of Michael Eavis.

A problem Glastonbury hasn't quite had to face yet

There's been a bit of trouble at the Rocklahoma music festival - not people writhing in agony at the name, but high wind and thunderstorms blowing away two stages from the site:

Intricate rigging, amps and metal pillars holding lighting, banners and electrical gear on the north and south side stages “fell in slow motion, like someone took a finger and pushed them forward,” said 12-year-old Nate Cook, who had taken shelter in a nearby merchandise tent when the rain started.
[...]
“The lights went off, everything went,” said Tommy Gunn, whose band, Hollywood Harlot, was scheduled to perform on the stage on Sunday. “Stu* was thrown everywhere, it was a total mess.”

Probably the first time Hollywood Harlot has got a namecheck in an extreme weather story, we'd guess. Or any metal band, come to that. Unless Iron Maiden have been doubling up as storm chasers.

The show did go on, though. We loved this bit in the Tulsa World round-up of the event:

"We watched the sun come up," said Mark Lundbert, 40. "We went to bed at 4:30 or 5."

Lumbert was sporting a skull and crossbones T-shirt, sunglasses and a backward visor covering his long hair. Most people are surprised to hear he's a Unix administrator for an insurance company back in Denver.

You know what? We bet they aren't.

Glastonbury blog round-up: A broad umbrella

At the moment, it's one-nil to the stay-at-homes. Our Man In Newcastle relishes being in Newcastle:

There was a moment earlier today that I kicked myself for not attending Glastonbury.

A quick look at the webcam and it looked, well, dry. And there are few better places in the world than a dry Glastonbury.

But then I just checked again and this is what the place looks like now and all of a sudden I’m glad I’ll be tuning into to it on the sofa later.

Yes, it's pouring. Just like Carol Kirkwood claimed it wouldn't.

Mind you, someone sees this as an opportunity, claims the Adelaide Green Porridge Cafe:

In a bid to break the drought, the South Australian Government has made a bid to buy the Glastonbury Festival and move it to Adelaide.

The Premier, Mike Rann said that rain was so predictable at the festival that it could help to turn things around in South Australia, facing another summer of drought.

They could just try hiring Michael Eavis to tell them it's raining.

Tamsin is also glad to be home:

I just waved off 3 little sisters and a de-facto brother-in-law heading for Glasto. Again. They are braver than me. I am weak. If it had been a sunny day I might have managed to get my head together. But as it is, rain and clouds and mud on the agenda, and a night of dreaming about WHAT IF, I've decided to listen to my inner voice screaming "For fuck sake NO!" and cut my losses with Glasto 2008. Hey ho. All that planning and being excited for nought. Nice one cosmic joker!

The Beat Happening is coming at you from the press tent, via the magic of wifi:

I have to admit, since I got here it’s all pretty much gone by the book; I’ve covered about twenty miles on foot, bought a gallon of industrial strength cider from a local farm, spent half my festival budget on one burger, lost my phone, and been rained on far too much for my optimum moisture levels.

And let's put the cynicism to one side for a moment. Glastonbury can be magic:
life of a so-called shutterbug reminds us how:

http://ernimason.livejournal.com/14297.html">Six years ago, I was at Glastonbury festival with one of my best friends and her boyfriend. What an amazing place. It's still one of my favourite places in all the world to be. The only place I've felt completly free and had no worries at all. The Friday evening hit, and my friend's boyfriend had a call saying that some of his friends had managed to get free tickets and were on their way down, and we'd meet them in a field under the big paper star, after Coldplay's set. So we walked to meet them. And there, under a star, I met Gary for the first time - now I say the first time. I'd met him once before but hadn't spoken to him properly. - We spent the next day and a half together. The rest, as they say, is history ;)

The post is tagged 'husband'.

Glastonbury: This year, we'll get it right

Last year, even as cars struggled to make it out the car park, Michael Eavis was chipper and upbeat in his assessment of the festival:

Mr Eavis has praised festival-goers' spirit and said the weekend had "gone very, very well, in spite of the rain and mud".

Oddly, though, it now turns out it didn't at all, after all:

"I thought the criticisms were valid last year," he said. "I can't turn back time, but what I can do is address the problem this year. There's extra camping space. We've ordered in lorryloads of concrete sleepers which will effectively double the seating."

Well, yes there would need to be extra camping space, what with the extra tickets you've sold. And while sitting on concrete sleepers might be alright if the weather's good, they're not going to be attractive in pissing-down rain and churning mud, are they?

Eavis: Blame the weatherman

The drop in registrants for Glastonbury Festival could be down to many reasons: the less-than-stellar line-up this year; the changing atmosphere at the festival; even the 'papers, please, citizen' need to register in the first place. All these things, of course, are down to decisions taken by the organisers.

So it's perhaps no surprise that Emily Eavis is looking for a reason beyond their control:

Eavis said that she thought that figures were down because the last two Glastonbury festivals, in 2005 and 2007, were characterised by mud and rain, putting people off, and that suggestions that the announcement that Jay-Z would be playing a headline slot was to blame were unfounded.

"I'm sure it's because of the weather," she told NME.COM. "People only remember the last festival, so if it was really muddy… I don't blame them, to be honest. Everybody needs a rest."

Nearly every bloody Glastobury Festival is characterised by mud - why would 2007's mud suddenly put people off when, say, the horrors of 1998 didn't?

Rhianna apologises for the poor weather, kind of

After some people (and by "some people" we mean people who fill in the gaps between the journalism in newspapers) blamed Rhianna for cursing the British summer - because she made a song about Umbrellas, which meteorologists have proven could affect the ocean surface temperature in the mid-Atlantic to a point that would lead to an additional two or three inches rainfall across the UK - Rhianna has said... that she feels bad. A bit:

"I feel bad about that," Rihanna told WENN. "I don't think it's my fault. I think the weather helped to keep the song there for so long. It worked for me."

Aha. So it must have been arranged by her marketing department then: "sod the novelty umbrellas, we're spending the entire advertising budget on seeding clouds..."

[Thanks to James P]

I still like trucks, big trucks

Somewhat incongruously, the heavy rain has led the organisers of the Truck Festival in Oxfordshire this weekend to ask festival goers to turn up on foot this weekend:

1.DO NOT COME TODAY (FRIDAY)

2. If possible, take public transport. There are hourly buses from Oxford and Didcot. We are still working on an alternative car parking plan as the parking fields are likely to be very muddy or even underwater.

3. Get dropped off in the village and walk up.

4. We do not recommend that you bring camper vans as they are likely to get stuck in mud.

It's the "or even underwater" which really suggests they're not mucking about, isn't it?

T gets boggier still

The weather continues to bring misery to T in the Park: at the end of the evening yesterday organisers had to close the car park and are trying to encourage people turning up to today to take the bus:

A spokesman for the festival said: "There have been major traffic queues due to the wet weather conditions which has made parking on site extremely difficult.

"As a result this has slowed down traffic into the event and caused tailbacks.

"While we are working as hard as we can to resolve this we would encourage fans coming to the event on Saturday to take a shuttle bus instead of driving to alleviate traffic."

The BBC coverage this year hasn't been quite as luxurious as in recent years - it's not clear if this is down to Mark Thompson's belt-tightening regime, or the strain of also covering Live Earth at the same time. But last night's BBC Three programme didn't offer press red choicey-choicey magic, which left us with little option but to watch the Arctic Monkeys - who, frankly, looked like a band who'd given their all at Glastonbury the other week and were treating this as a wind down - and Lily Allen. Allen does, undeniably, is great on these sorts of occasions - all smiley and welcoming and personable. It's just a pity that she's not very good at singing live. Even her best stuff - Littlest Things, which could be good enough to be a Kate Nash b-side - calls for a beyond her limited range.