Bedingfield chooses her leader

In the midst of an article describing how she "rejects" size zero and the pressures on young girls, surrounded by photos of her flatpack belly, Natsaha Bedingfield talks to Fabulous, the News of the World's Sunday magazine. They ask her to choose between Gordon Brown and David Cameron:

David Cameron, I think. Which party is he with? Conservative party? Oh, so not him. I don’t like being political.

If you don't know which party the leader of the Opposition is with, you probably have never actually tried being political. What on earth was she basing her choice of Cameron on in the first place?

Bedingfield: Cockneys aren't normal

We presume - we hope - that Natahsa Bedingfield was talking about exaggerated voices on records when she suggested cockney voices aren't normal:

"When I was in England last year it was all about girls with Cockney accents - Lily Allen and Kate Nash. It's all inspired by people like The Streets and Dizzee Rascal.

"I liked it but I'll be happy when normal voices come back."

Although Allen and Nash don't have cockney accents anyway, do they? Aren't they more estuarine?

Darkness at 3AM: What have they got against Bedingfield?

Have the new 3AM Girls got some sort of score to settle with Natasha Bedingfield? Yesterday they ran a piece snorting at her "ten fans" and then suggesting that she'd let down a UK fanbase that they claimed didn't exist. Today, Bedingfield's people have tried to make ammends:

The singer's people have been on to us saying she's as "disappointed as her fans" and that she "really wants to come home ASAP and make it up to them".

Mmmmm...

We're told: " She'll release a single with Sean Kingston this spring and do some free gigs in the UK before the end of summer to try and give something back to the fans."

And the 3AMies response?

Try harder.

What? Free gigs, a tour as soon as possible, a new single? What do the 3AMies want, exactly? Some sort of ritual act of contrition? Self-evisceration on national television, perhaps?

Darkness at 3AM: Groins gone toxic

Day four of the new management at 3AM, and it looks like they've already run into the ground: today, they're running with Alfie Allen's public hair.

Yes, the-brother-of-the-daughter-of-the-bloke-from-the-mouthwash-advert. Apparently he's had to have his pubes trimmed before going onstage in Equus.

Yes, that's their lead story.

They also have a pop stars get drunk shocka - the Arctic Monkeys, in this case. They attempt to make the story interesting by injecting a not-very-subtle drugs reference:

Jaime [Winston, who turned up] clearly had quite a thirst as she kept shouting for her Coke.

Do you get... oh, you do.

More surprisingly, they manage to get the Natasha Bedingfield story completely wrong:

All that attention in the States must have gone to Natasha Bedingfield's head 'cos she seems to have forgotten where she comes from.

The toothy singer has cracked America by being the first UK-signed female to enter the Billboard album charts at number three. And her next single is being released in the US first.

Except, of course, the album was held back for months in the US before being pushed out in the weak, post-Christmas period - hence its better-than-expected chart entry point - garnering a bunch of less-than-impressed reviews.

But with all this talk of being big in the US, she's ignoring her UK fans.

All 10 of them, that is, because last night Natasha cancelled all her UK tour dates again blaming US commitments.

"Last night"? Ten days ago, surely?

Bedingfield to UK: Feel the rain on your own bloody skins

What are we to make of the excuse given for Natasha Bedingfield pulling her UK tour?

"It is with the greatest regret that Natasha Bedingfield has had to cancel her forthcoming U.K. tour. "This is through no fault of Natasha herself, but due to her American record label insisting that she remains in the U.S. to promote the release of her album. All tickets will be reimbursed."

Clearly, if it's economic to pull the tour in the UK, while having to desperately pump the album in the US, there's something going wrong somewhere in the Bedingfield camp.

Certainly, critical reaction to Pocketful of Sunshine has been somewhat muted - it scrapes 66 on Metacritic. The label isn't that impressed with the album, either; it had previously shelved the release last Spring (Pocketful Of Sunshine is the record released as NB in the UK, with some new tracks trying to pad out the collection.)

It's also amusing that Sony BMG are putting the blame on Bedingfield's "American label" for the cancellation - Bedingfield being on Epic in the US, which is a brand of Sony BMG. So when they say "her American record label", they mean... erm, "us".

Bedingfield showers Madge with respect

Natasha Bedingfield - the woman off the shampoo advert soundtrack - has had a crack at doing Ray of Light for that Radio One at 40 album, and didn't find it easy:

"I have so much respect for Madonna after learning how hard it is to sing that song. She has an amazing voice - the range you need to sing the song is incredible."

Actually, Natasha, it's a fairly easy song to sing if you're a professional singer. What you're saying is not that Madonna is unbelievably talented, more that you're just a person who can sing a bit.

Natasha nixes 'no knickers' nonsense

Natashas Bedingfield has denied the story about her going on stage knickerless for the Diana concert without underwear. Not even practical, she claims:

"Anyone who believed that rumour needs to look up the meaning of the word gullible and apply it to themselves. Think about it, I wore a mini dress, the cameras and audience were directly below and it was windy... I'm not about to expose myself to millions of viewers and Princes."

Millions of Princes, of course, would be very disappointed. This, of course, is not simply an attempt to try and keep the story alive by referring to it again to keep it stoked up, of course.

We also love the slightly outraged tone of her post. "It was windy and I was wearing a short skirt and above everybody...." - which seems to suggest she was happy enough to flash her knickers in front of the millions of Princes, allowing us to carefully calibrate that she's not that sort of girl, but she is the other sort of girl.

Victoria Newton has won prizes for gossiping

Well, that was a busy weekend - Live Earth, T in the Park, Oxegen, and the F1 race and the tennis match. Clearly, with all the celebrities off doing stuff all over the place, Victoria Newton's column today must be groaning at the seams with A-list filth.

IT'S hardly the fussiest of demands but NATASHA BEDINGFIELD proved she was a cool customer at the British Grand Prix - by sending a waitress to fetch her an ice-cream cone.

While the VIP hospitality tent only had posh sorbet, Nat decided she'd rather have two scoops leaving one poor sole [sic] to trudge to another tent and bring back the dessert.

Newton deems minor celeb asks for ice cream so important she gives it an "exclusive" tag. Although the apparent claim it was a fish which went to fetch the ice-cream is mildly impressive.

It's what she would have wanted

How did Natasha Bedingfield pay tribute to Diana at the Mawkmorial Concert?

By not wearing any pants:

The stunning blonde, 25, who performed her hit single Unwritten at the bash, said after the show: “I’ve got nothing on underneath this dress!”

There's something very Diana-esque about not only not bothering with knickers, but drawing attention to it as well. We bet the Franklin Mint does a figurine depicting just that.

Where in the world are the 3AM Girls

We're sure cash-strapped Trinity Mirror will be delighted that they've flown the 3AM girls out to Coachella, meaning that this morning's column is full of reports filed with the exciting byline:

"3AM at the COACHELLA music festival, California"

Amongst the stories being filed from sunny California are:

Natasha Bedingfield plays GAY in London
Madonna goes to Claridges, in London, with a rubbish new haircut
Matt Lucas goes to a restaurant in London
and
The Arctic Monkeys album goes to number one. In the UK.

Money well spent hauling them halfway across the world, then.

The sound you can hear is the ghost of Diana throwing herself down stairs again

It's coming from Victoria Newton, so it may well be wrong, but she's suggesting the line-up for the Diana concert is going to be officially swollen today with Keith Allen's daughter, Rod Stewart and Natasha Bedingfield.

Rod we're not surprised by, but Lily Allen? A kissin' the hand of the delightful piano-playing Princes? We'd never have had her down as a forelock tugger. And, to be honest, we can't really picture her fitting in the "sort of bands that Diana would be listening to now, had she been wearing a seatbelt" basis of the booking policy.

Are we the only people who think of Natasha Bedingfield as being like Melchester Rovers? You read about her being really successful and popular, but you know that's only in some world made-up, not in the real world that we actually live in.

It looks like it's almost as hard to find attractions for the Diana gig as it is to find a coroner for the Diana inquest.