No Rock And Roll Fun

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Darkness at 3AM: It's the Google-eyes

Oh, the 3AM Girls are excited this morning:

We knew that U2 were big - but now they're visible from SPACE!

The amazing giant claw that is the centrepiece to their 360 tour party is so huge Google Earth can pick it up as it moves around the world with Bono and the boys.

I don't want to really blow their minds, but you can see the table on our patio on Google Earth, should you wish to.

Gordon in the morning: Waiting at the gates for health updates

The nation holds its collective breath as news reaches Gordon that Kasabian are unwell:

KASABIAN have been rocked by a swine flu outbreak on tour.

Swine flu, eh?

Speaking from his Sydney hotel room, SERGE PIZZORNO said: "We're all sick as dogs, man. It's pretty terrible. It's a bit of a virus that we picked up in Japan."

So is it swine flu or "a bit of a virus"?

Gordon;s insistence that it's swine flu seems purely there to set up what I think is meant to be a punchline of some sort:

When the Rolling Stones were on tour during their pomp, they often came down with something similar - line flu.

I don't know what makes my head hurt more - the weak drug pun, or the desperate attempt to try and force Tom Meighan having the snuffles in to some sort of debauched rock history frame.

Elsewhere in Gordon's pages today: man catches bus.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Jim Kerr: I won't forget about you

Having admitted that, effectively, he made Simple Minds in the states, Jim Kerr has offered a few words on the death of John Hughes:

“When we perform ‘Don’t You (Forget About Me)’ on the forthcoming tour, we’ll be thinking about John Hughes and how his enthusiasm for the sound of Simple Minds made us go the extra mile when we recorded it back in 1984. Everyone was hell bent on making a classic piece of pop rock, but little did we know the kind of longevity the film would have on generations to come. The Breakfast Club helped us kick the door down, and once there, no one could ever lock us out or tell us again what it felt like to be No.1 in America.”

Is it just me or does that end a little bit oddly? "Now we've been number one, nobody can tell us what it feels like"? But you could, couldn't you? "It feels totally different now, you know, as there's a sense of underwhelming disappointment, Mr. Kerr."

Polka News Network: Crossover polks

The Grammys might want to put polka in a corner, but polka won't be sidelined. Oh no, not while there's polka fusion. Polka-Pink Floyd fusion, to be precise.

Yes, the band is called Polka Floyd. They're from Toledo. And they sound like this:

Lemonheads coming into your arms - or at least near them

Evan Dando is going to be doing a little tour of bigger venues next month.

Those dates:

Glasgow ABC - September 10
Dublin Academy - 11
Belfast Speakeasy/Mandela Hall - 12
Manchester Academy 2 - 13
Birmingham Irish Centre - 15
London Leicester Square Theatre - 16
London Forum - 19

Skunk Anansie: Why we're back

Why have Skunk Anansie reformed?

You could ask Newsbeat why they're back, as the band have explained it's fan pressure:

"My Dog," laughs bass player Cass when asked about whose idea it was to come back together. "He kept telling me and I had to persuade these people that I wasn't mad."

In fact, it was they say fan pressure that led them back into each other's lives.
Skunk Anansie Lead singer Skin will put her solo career on hold

"They've been on our case for years for us to do this," says lead singer Skin.

"The whole thing has been led by MySpace and the revolution of our fans," adds guitarist Ace.

Why, yes. Fan pressure. What can you do in the face of that? As Newsbeat explains:

What the reunion does mean is that all other plans are shelved including Skin's solo career ("I've got an electronic project that's just going to have to wait"), Ace's guitar tutoring and Mark Richardson's stint drumming with Brit band Feeder.

Skin's solo career. Yes. Wikipedia tracks the course of that:

* "Trashed" (June 2003) - UK #30
* "Faithfulness" (September 2003) - UK #64
* "Lost / Getting Away With It" (2003) Double A-side
* "Alone In My Room" (November 2005) (Download only)
* "Just Let The Sun" (March 2006) UK Indie Chart #27
* "Purple" (Limited release in The Netherlands and download)
* "Nothing But" (Promotional release in Italy only)
* "Tear Down These Houses" (January 2008) (Italian release only)

It's not exactly going to have taken many phone calls to put the freeze on limited-Italian-release-only type projects, is it?

American Head Charge: At least you won't have to pretend to be surprised when they reunite

I have to be honest, I wasn't aware American Head Charge were still a going concern. Nor did Cameron Heacock, apparently:

A statement from bassist Chad Hanks reads, "We've been ready and waiting for input from Cameron for almost two years; we've written and recorded two albums worth of material in that time.

"At this point, he no longer gives being in this band any sort of top priority, which is so sad, seeing as how he has such an amazing and unique voice; I couldn't wait to hear it on these songs. However, we’re looking forward to some new blood; a young, hungry soul that doesn't sound like anyone else and is ready to work his ass off."

Yes, the band are going to continue, if they can find someone else to do the singing.

Leaking: you're doing it wrong

An email plops into our inbox:

first Dead Man's Bones leaked track

Hey- here is the first leaked song from Dead Man's Bones called "My Body's a Zombie For You". The record comes Oct 6 on Anti.

*link*

Feel free to post/share

If you've got your PR team sending the track out by email, it's not actually a leak, is it?

Lady Gaga: She will eat your children or something

You'd really hope it was a joke, but Vigilant Citizen - and the suggestion that Lady GaGa is an "Illuminati Puppet" seems to be in earnest.

Apparently, she's the victim of mind control and ohmygodshecoversuponeeyeallthetime:

You only need to look at a couple of Lady Gaga pictures or videos to notice that she is constantly hiding one of her eyes. Most people will simply interpret this as ”a cool thing to do” or a “fashion statement”. Those who have passed the 101 of Illuminati symbolism know that the All-Seeing Eye is probably its most recognizable symbol. The gesture of hiding one eye, usually the left one, goes way back in occult orders.

The very really possibility that it's a lazy trademark gesture that she hopes nobody will notice has been ripped off iD apparently need not detain us.

Still, at least there's some good news:

While masses of young people imitate Gaga’s brain-dead persona, the subversive symbolism surrounding her art still reaches the fan’s subconscious. She is not the Antichrist though (last I’ve heard), she is simply one of the many pop stars sending out similar messages to the public.

Phew! She's not the Antichrist. That's reassuring to know.

[Ta to cassettes won't listen]

Gordon in the morning: Welcome to the cheap seats

Can this story really be true?

IT sounds like the worst piece of theatre ever thought of but AMY WINEHOUSE: The Musical may be coming to a stage near you.

No, of course it isn't true. What Gordon is reporting as if it was a fully-formed idea seems to be little more than whimsy on the part of Winehouse's brother:

The star's brother Alex reckons an all-singing, all-dancing production based on the singer's life would be a fantastic way to celebrate her chart comeback.

He says: "Amy is much better. I think one day there could be a musical of Amy's life.

"You just don't ever know how far things can go these days - look at all this talk of a JADE GOODY musical."

One day, Gordon is going to be sitting near a hungry celebrity, and we're going to see a story yelling "Robert Palmer is intending to eat an entire horse" within hours.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Bono's Spider show hangs by a thread

The Bono and Edge scored Spiderman musical is on hold due to a "cash-flow crisis":

A statement on Sunday from the publicists for Hello Entertainment, one of the producers of “Spider-Man, Turn Off the Dark,” said work had been suspended on the musical because of “an unexpected cash flow problem.” The statement went on to say: “The plans necessary for this correction are in hand now, and it is expected that activities, including work in the theater, will resume within the immediate future and with no material impact upon the planned production schedule.”

That's an odd sort of immediate future - one which is immediate, but apparently unforeseeable.

Q has a slippery definition of the word "exclusive"

Here's some exciting news (if you can pretend to be excited by U2 for a minute) as Q trumpets an exclusive:

Q Radio will exclusively broadcast U2's entire show from Sheffield's Don Valley Stadium on the night of Thursday, 20 August.

Exclusive, huh? That's quite a coup, a small digital network like Q signing up those rights.

But... hang on a moment, what's this announcement from the Big City network?

The Bauer Radio network has secured the live broadcast rights to U2's latest tour, planning to air the band's Sheffield concert across its 20-station Big City network and three of its national digital stations.
[...]
The Big City network programme director, Steve King, said the concert would be the "biggest commercial radio event of 2009".

"U2 are very appropriate for the Big City network - they are straight down the middle of our audience, particularly the more recent material from their last album and the one before that," he said. "There aren't many artists you can do this with – U2, Take That, possibly Robbie Williams."

You would have thought that since Big City and Q are both Bauer stations, the trumpeting of "exclusive" on something that isn't could have been avoided.

To be fair, though, Big City stations won't quite be broadcasting the whole thing:

Longer pieces between songs would be taken out, King said, because they were not so relevant to a radio audience.

Presumably, though, Q will still leave those bits in, exclusively covering the bits that are meaningless on radio.

Disney not exactly endorsing latest Hannah Montana outing

Miley Cyrus' time as an employee of Disney is clearly now in its final stages, after Cyrus' pole dance at the Teen Choice awards.

Disney doesn't actually say "she is so gounded" but...:

According to Newsday.com, a spokesperson for the network said in a statement: "Disney Channel won't be commenting on that performance, although parents can rest assured that all content presented on the Disney Channel is age-appropriate for our audience — kids 6-14 — and consistent with what our brand values are."

So, in other words, not like Miley Cyrus in a tiny top and skimpy shorts writhing on a pole, oh no.

Cyrus, for her part, has attempted to explain why her show wasn't supposed to look like late-night entertainment backstage at a Gary Glitter concert:

Before she took the stage at the show, Cyrus spoke to MTV News about the performance, saying she wanted the whole thing to be a spoof on growing up in Tennessee, adding that "it's about my roots."

"[My] performance tonight is funny, but I wanted it to be about [something more]," she said. "I'm like, 'This is to represent where I am from. I'm so proud of it.' All the girls trying to be Hollywood and stuff with their big glasses, me shooing them away."

As far as we can tell from Wikipedia and other sources, Cyrus didn't actually grow up in a Ukranian brothel, in Tennessee or elsewhere. Perhaps it looks different when viewed through, um, the big glasses of Hollywood. Perhaps.

Dylan gigs cancelled due to risk of the sun

Who knew? Holding outdoor gigs in Arizona during August could put people at the risk of health problems from the sun? Bob Dylan's gigs have been pulled as the thermometer hits 110. Fahrenheit, admittedly, but that's still weather you don't want to be outdoors in.

Radio without controls

Ah, design. When it's great, it enhances our lives and our world. When it's rubbish... well, you wind up with a radio without buttons being pushed as a leap forward:

Developed by Cambridge Consultants and Armour Group PLC, it is due to hit UK shelves in time for Christmas.

Rachel Harker, Business Development Manager for Cambridge Consultants, said: ''We realised that digital radios are difficult to use and you have to be quite techno-savvy to use them.

''We thought wouldn't it be great to have a radio that anyone from a child to your granny could use.

''The Q2 Cube is designed for everyone, not just 'gadgety' people. It's really quite simple.''

Given that current digital radios are quite like ordinary radios, it's not entirely clear where the demand for something less confusing comes from, but let's say there is. How does it work?

With no buttons, knobs or display, you switch to one of four pre-programmed digital radio stations by turning the cube onto the appropriate side.

The stations are selected via an online account on your home computer, and then wirelessly streamed to the cube anywhere in the house.

Users can change the volume of the speaker on the front panel simply by tilting the cube forwards or back.

So it's really simple to use, providing you can handle the bit where you set up the channels originally on your PC and are able to get your wifi, PC and radio to all speak to each other. Which is the bit that usually makes IP radio difficult. Oh, and if you decide you want to listen to something other than one of the four stations, you have to hike back to your computer to make the change. That's really simple, right there, then.

[via @drivelcast]

Feargal Sharkey pins his hopes on all-you-can-eat

UK Music - the group which represents the bits of people working in music who choose to be represented by it, and nobody else - has issued a report which... well, you know what it will show. People download music and don't pay for it.

It turns out Sharkey's people are now throwing their weight behind all-you-can-eat pricing - presumably because they imagine that the major labels can slice a subsidy off the internet service providers without any really noticing.

The survey finds that a majority of respondents use file-sharing:

Feargal Sharkey, former lead singer of the Undertones and now chief executive of UK Music, is phlegmatic about young people's behaviour.

"Have they got the message that there is a thing called copyright and there is a philosophy of copyright? Yup. They get it. They just don't care," he says.

"What they're quite clearly trying to explain to us at the minute is that we can get it for free and we're not going to get caught."

Well, not quite, Feargal. What you and the RIAA still are having trouble grasping (once again) is that people respect there's copyright in music; it's just that they perceive the market value of individual song files to be zero, or nearly zero. Until you come to terms with that, you're not going to be able to develop a strategy for making money in the new world. (All you can eat, by the way, is not a strategy.)

That's what I'm talking about

Clearly, HMV have money to burn, as they're investing in those weird advertising screens that Alan Sugar is making his "lucky" Apprentices work on.

Indeed, it was Lee McQueen who "brokered" the deal between HMV and Amscreen. Rumours that the screens will be used to flash up the thoughts of Gennaro Castaldo as soon as they occur could not be confirmed at this time.

Xfm tries to get it right; gets it wrong

Actually, we're being unfair. Johnny Borrell presenting a programme on Xfm isn't wrong for the station. Indeed, set against the confused attempts by a mainstream station to try and give itself a veneer of the supposed alternative station in Global's not-very-diverse radio portfolio, putting Borrell on is a radical move. That's what makes it so heartbreaking.

"Xfm are the only station who would let me play Buju Banton next to Allen Ginsberg within the same show. It's going to be one hour each night of the songs they don't play on the radio," said Borrell.

He's right, you know. Of course, any number of radio stations - Radio 1, 2, 3 and 6; NME Radio probably - would have shows with that sort of playlist. But none in their right mind would take Borrell on to play them, for fear of becoming the butt of gags.

Not Xfm, mind, who seem to genuinely believe that Borrell is veiwed as one part Andy Kershaw to two parts Richey Manic:

Paul Jackson, group programme director of Xfm, alongside sister Global Radio stations 95.8 Capital FM and the Hit Music Network, said Borrell was a "creative genius and a great storyteller".

He added: "We've always loved Razorlight at Xfm and we're looking forward to seeing what Johnny does with the show and which tracks he chooses."

Well, at least there's going to be one listener. And Johnny will probably get his mum to tape it for him to listen to when he gets home.

Jet become unwitting Placebo tribute act

After Brian Molko's collapse on stage the other night, Nic Cester has followed suit:

Aussie Rocker Nic Cester from JET collapsed tonight on stage at Q The Music Club Live At Hard Rock Café as part of the worldwide promotional tour for the band's upcoming CD, SHAKA ROCK.

The singer had been unwell all day but insisted on coming to the gig and not letting fans down. JET took to the stage at 8pm GMT and performed "Rip It Up" and She's A Genius" before Nic passed out.

Nic got up on his feet and jokingly told the audience he had Swine Flu before collapsing for a second time.

Nic was walked off stage by the band's tour management leaving Cam, Chris and Mark to soldier on to perform 3 more songs - "Holiday," "Beat On Repeat" And "Get What You Need."

Nic was rushed to University College Hospital in Euston, London, UK in an ambulance and is being treated for symptoms of gastroenteritis, acute vomiting and dehydration. The singer will be held overnight for monitoring.

I'm not sure playing an overprice tourist cafe is quite the gig it's worth putting your health at risk for, but I suppose you have to admire his commitment to ensuring the show must go on. Even if you'd perhaps rather it hadn't.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Folkobit: Mike Seeger

Mike Seeger, doomed forever to be thought of as the less-famous half-brother of Pete, has died.

Less famous, but no less significant, though: Seeger's career as a folk archivist and musician stretched across six decades. He was a key figure in the 1950s folk revival - mainly but not exclusively through the New Lost City Ramblers. In 2007, his work helped Robert Plant and Alison Krauss to a Grammy.

Seeger suffered from multiple myeloma. He died on Friday.

This is him in 2007, performing Cumberland Gap at a festival in Wintergreen:

Let's hope they don't give him a Placebo

Brian Molko collapsed during last night's Osaka gig. There's a statement:

We would firstly like to thank you for all your kind words and messages of support regarding Brian’s health after fainting at the show in Osaka, Japan, yesterday.

It is always incredibly disappointing when a show cannot take place for any reason, particularly on this occasion due to Brian being unwell, as we have looked forward for such a long time to these shows in Japan!

We have undertaken a gruelling and intensive schedule over the last few months and the last couple of weeks alone played 5 countries in 9 days. Brian picked up a virus which coupled with jet lag and exhaustion caused his collapse on stage. Thanks to prompt and professional care Brian is recovering well.

We would like to extend our grateful thanks and sincere apologies to the fans who made a huge effort travelling to see us in Osaka, especially after long queue’s in the heavy rain. We would also like to extend many thanks and apologies to the promoters, Creative Man, at Summer Sonic for all their help and understanding under difficult circumstances.

We are all the more devastated after such an amazing show in Tokyo on Saturday where the crowd was incredible. We were so excited to be back in Japan after a few years away and we were reminded what a very special place Japan is to us.

Thank you all for your ongoing support and we hope to make it up to you with new dates in Japan very soon. We love your country and can’t wait to come back.

A virus, you say? *cough* *swineflu* *cough*.

Although, of course, I'm not a doctor. Apparently even if you cut the diploma off the Wheaties box neatly, it still doesn't count.

[Thanks, @dillpickle]

Final Fantasy sign to Domino

More good news: Final Fantasy - near enough to an Arcade Fire spin-off as to make not much difference for our purposes here - have signed to Domino. Owen Pallett is promising an album early next year as a result.

Membranes forming up again

The comebacks which delight are often, it seems, centered on All Tomorrow's Parties, and this one adds to that strike rate: The Membranes are getting back together at the behest of My Bloody Valentine. This is the Nightmare Before Christmas one.

John Robb is, naturally, verbose in his excitement:

Like King Arthur's knights buried beneath the soil of Merrie Englande we are ready to be called on in the country's hour of peril. We were called. And we will play.

It's not clear where they were during the time of Gareth Gates, but better late than never, eh?

Steve Lammo to go

Steve Lamacq's last fingerhold on the Radio One schedule has been pried away, as his In New Music We Trust slot has been axed as part of an overhaul of specialist music programming on the network.

Because these things are always circular, his programme is going in order to make room for hour-long music documentaries. The same hour-long music documentaries which were originally dropped when Lamacq Live was brought in a few years back.

There's also another returning format, as a new version of Roundtable comes to Tuesdays:

Tuesdays (9.00-10.00pm) sees Nihal hosting a four-way battle of wits and fury as a journalist, a musician and a DJ discuss the qualities (or lack of) of the biggest records, films and games released that week in Radio 1's new review programme.

This back-to-the-Bannister era of programming - Huw Stephens is even turning up with something that's a bit like Out On Blue Six - is being pitched as a way of connecting with the yoof (and, presumably, trying to head off the calls for privatisation):

Andy Parfitt, Controller, Radio 1, adds: "Taken together with our recent revamp of the core daytime schedule, this represents one of the most significant shake-ups of the whole schedule in recent times and will help us focus on a new generation of Radio 1 listeners."

Hmm. It all sounds a little hotch-potchy, and swapping Annie Mac with Pete Tong and giving Tim Westwood his own programme again hardly seems to be quite as earth-shattering as Parfitt would suggest.

Those other new programmes in full:

* Annie Nightingale moves from Saturdays (5.00-7.00am) to Fridays (2.00-4.00am)
* Rob da Bank moves from Mondays (2.00-4.00am) to Saturdays (5.00-7.00am)
* Mary-Anne Hobbs moves from Tuesdays (2.00-4.00am) to Thursdays (2.00-4.00am)
* Gilles Peterson moves from Thursdays (2.00-4.00am) to Tuesdays (2.00-4.00am)
* 1Xtra's Mixtape on Sunday from 3.00-5.00am will be presented by Seani B (as a result of Mistajam moving to the new 11.00pm-1.00am show)

Rob DaBank's excellenty programme now effectively filling in the early breakfast slot on a Saturday? Is that going to work?

Sunday, August 09, 2009

Even if the music industry won't learn from their mistakes, someone is

Chris Ahearn, President, Media at Thomson Reuters, has been watching and learning:

Blaming the new leaders or aggregators for disrupting the business of the old leaders, or saber-rattling and threatening to sue are not business strategies – they are personal therapy sessions. Go ask a music executive how well it works.

A better approach is to have a general agreement among community members to treat others’ content, business and ideas with the same respect you would want them to treat yours…

Perhaps EMI should think about approaching him?

[via John Naughton]

John Hughes weekend: Sixteen Candles... three

Don't worry, there isn't going to be a track for every one of the candles, but you can't let a chance to post Altered Images slide by, can you?

Buy
Altered Images - Happy Birthday Plus

[Part of the John Hughes weekend]

John Hughes weekend: Sixteen Candles... two

Also from the soundtrack, the supreme song-about-wanking:

Buy
The Vapors - New Clear Days

[part of The John Hughes weekend]

John Hughes weekend: Sixteen Candles

Taking the memorial John Hughes feature into the soundtrack of Sixteen Candles - the key work, surely?

First up, here's Nick Heyward from 2008 doing Whistle Down The Wind:

Buy
Nick Heyward: Very Best Of...
Sixteen Candles DVD

[Part of the John Hughes weekend]

Mark Lester to Paris Jackson: Consider yerself one of us

Tucked in the tawdry unfolding tragedy of the Jackson fallout, as Mark Lester chooses the News of the World to announce his suspicion that Paris is his kid, is this:

"It's been a secret for so long," said Mark. "In 1996 Michael asked me if I would give him my sperm and I said yes. It was a gift to him, no money was paid, it was something I was honoured to do. He wanted children so badly."

That sort of request has the ability to get very awkward very quickly:

- Can I have your sperm? Yes? That so... mffff... I meant in this jar, Mark. I meant in the jar... God, it makes your eyes sting, doesn't it?

The appearance of this paternity claim, naturally, is what Michael would have wanted:

"I'm the Godparent to them and Michael was Godparent to all my four kids. Our two families spent a lot of time together, and had a lot fun together. Now I'm not able to have any communication with the children. My repeated phone calls aren't returned and emails go unanswered.

"This isn't what Michael would have wanted. I feel I have to come forward, as my only way of saying, 'Please don't shut me out!'"

Yes, having constructed an elaborate ruse and pretended for a decade that the children were his, Jackson would so have been thrilled to see the story falling apart in the pages of a British tabloid newspaper.