Saturday, March 20, 2010

First night: Chapterhouse

There's been surprisingly little in the way of reviews of the Chapterhouse gig at La Scala on Thursday, but there is a smattering of YouTube videoage. So let's pretend we were at the gig, but squinting and with half-chewed Milky Ways in our ears.

First up, here's Pearl:



And then Falling Down:



Woooo-hooo, oooo, ooo...

[Buy: Whirlpool: The Original Recordings]


Jourgensen hooks up with Front Line Assembly

Front Line Assembly have announced, sort of, their album plans - Improvised Electronic Device is going to turn up later this Spring. With a special guest:

l Jourgensen has collaborated with Front Line Assembly on the track "Stupidity" providing lyrics and vocals. Al Jourgensen also arranged and mixed the track in his studio

He also made the tea, and washed the antimacassars after the recording session.

Obviously, given that tomorrow is the first day of Spring, "later this Spring" could be any time in the next three months.


SXSW 2010: Muse

I'm a little surprised at the NME report from Austin this evening:

Muse win over industry crowd at SXSW

Do Muse - who are more established than the Church Of England - really need to "win over" an "industry audience"? If the "industry" still needs to be "convinced" by Muse, hasn't it gone beyond the point of no return?


I collect, I reject: Pink's breath

Currently available on eBay: Pink's breath. In a bottle.

Handy, I guess, if you're pretty good at magic and want to use the breath, along with certain roots and the heart of a koala to create a Pink of your very own.

Even the seller admits that, you know, this might look a little odd:

PINK'S BREATH IN A BOTTLE

YES WEIRD BUT TRUE

To be fair, at no point does the seller imply it's Pink's entire breath. Just some of it.
This was captured by my 10 year old at her Melbourne concert .on the 14th of August 2009

My Daughter is such a huge Fan That she Thought of this on her own and got close enough for her to breath in the bottle ,

She has kept This bottle since the concert BUT She now wants to save any from this bottle money to try and meet Pink One Day So thats why she has decided to sell it.

If I was Pink, I'd be worried what this kid was planning to capture on the next meeting - kidneys? arms? Is she attempting to create Pink in kit form?
My Daughter Has asked that it go to someone that will Tresure it and Respect it for What it REALLY IS

Yeah, she doesn't want it to go to any old Joe who'd simply flog it on eBay for a... oh, hang on a minute.

So, how can we be sure that this bottle really contains Pink's breath, and isn't merely a bottle with ordinary air - air expired by non-famous people - collected within?
She has also Taken Pics with the Ticket So you Know she was really at the concert

Strictly speaking, having a ticket doesn't actually prove you were anywhere - I know a bloke who has a ticket for the maiden voyage of the Titanic, but I don't think that suggests he's over ninety and escaped a watery grave. And simply being at a concert doesn't mean the bottle was close enough to Pink's lungs on an expiration heave.
The bottle has never been opened since as there is no way in the world she would EVER allow it .

... because one whiff would tell you it's full of Corey Hart's butt and not Pink's lips.

The bids currently stand at $31. Think of it as an investment.


Graham Coxon makes himself look a bit of a pranny

Suzy Norman, who blogs at Queen Margot And The Supperclub, suggested that Graham Coxon might not come over well in No Distance Left To Run:

I couldn't help thinking I was watching a plasticine plonker, with wire glasses trying to remember where he'd put his oversized duffle coat as he was running late for new Nick Park audition where he hopes to play Wallace's nephew who's just been cycling around Europe on a monocycle but now needs a place to stay for a week before he goes on spiritual retreat in Gumberland; a sort of autobiographical role, made specially for him.

Now, some people might be a little upset by that sort of criticism. Others might take it on the chin. A few might, however, respond to being called a pranny by... well, behaving like a pranny.

Disappointingly, Coxon falls into that last group. a comment on QM&TSC explains what happened next:
The worst thing about the whole Graham Coxon thing?

Graham Leslie Coxon posted your blog link on his own forum, Graham said you needed it up the arse and that you were a cunt. It’s all down to him. So you see, the poor kiddies in forum land were just taking his lead when they decided to harass you.

Graham goes by the name Tin Hat in his forum and everyone there knows its HIM and they hang off his every illegibly typed word.

It's all a bit of a shame - that Coxon overreacts to a bad review; that he'd suggest that anal sex is somehow a corrective for a bad review; that he'd call someone he's never met a cunt. Some celebrities are starting to complain about the acrid nature of comments they have to deal with online; if the sort of semi-famous types who you think would know better are pitching in, what hope is there?


Lady GaGa shows former producer her poker face

Wrangling, tussling, duelling lawsuits flying between Lady GaGa and former producer Rob Fusari:

March 20 (Bloomberg) -- Lady Gaga sued her former music producer Rob Fusari saying he shouldn’t get any share of fees he says he’s entitled to after claiming he discovered her, dated her and helped develop her sound and style.

Hang about... did Bloomberg just say he's claiming fees in part for having dated Lady GaGa? Is this a normal transaction? "I must make it clear that I am taking you out for a pizza and will, later, twiddle your nipples for a couple of minutes before a moment of disappointing splooge, but it is on the strict understanding that should you become subsequently rich, I will issue a charge of fifty thousand dollars for the evening."


Gary Lucy fancies himself as Kurt Cobain

Admittedly, there'd be no reason why a clean-cut actor couldn't go on stage and make a convincing job of playing Kurt Cobain.

But Gary Lucy is hardly an actor, is he?

The star said: "Playing Kurt Cobain would be far removed from the glitz and glamour of doing Dancing On Ice."

You think, Gary?


6Music didn't deliberately crash Radio 4

To be honest, the bemused reaction of Stephin Merritt while being told that a snatch of 6Music had blasted out on Radio 4 probably sums up the event - it's one of those things that happens from time to time. Like the time the newsreader had a "migraine" and abandoned the 7pm bulletin a couple of sentences in between A Bit Of Fry And Laurie and The Archers.

Still, the official explanation of what happened is worth a closer look:

Diana Speed, the Radio 4 announcer on duty at the time of the takeover, apologised on-air for the interruption and has passed me this official account from her log of events:

R4 Network lost for 2'23" when 6MUSIC was transmitted on our six platforms on the Network Switcher. This was due to a mistake in monitoring when the Control Room did the switch for 6MUSIC from Western House to Manchester at 1900 and instead placed 6MUSIC on our output.I was unaware of loss of network because we monitor desk output in Con and that was going out as normal. Apology was made at the end of the programme.

Except... 6Music didn't crash Radio 4 at 7pm - which would have seen the pips and start of the news replaced with the 6Music running order and Marc Riley pretending to be somebody else. But the recording of the crash shows that both programmes were under way. Curious.


Embed and breakfast man: Congressman Cohen

Tennessee Democrat Steve Cohen marks the death of Alex Chilton on the floor of Congress:



[via @andrew_mueller]


Friday, March 19, 2010

More Band Aid allegations - this morning, from Band Aid

Bob Geldof's furious attack on the quality of BBC journalism following the reports about how some Ethiopian famine relief might have found its way into the hands of civil war fighters gets a sharp slapdown from an unexpected source this morning. the Daily Mail must have decided they dislike Geldof even more than they hate the BBC:

Today, for the first time, the Band Aid man on the ground in Ethiopia speaks out exclusively to The Daily Mail, saying he believes it is possible that up to 20 per cent of donor's money went to fund the rebels.

Furthermore, he told me that he personally sympathised with the rebel cause he calls 'a liberating force', and travelled in convoys he suspected were transporting arms to them.

John James was Band Aid Field Director in Ethiopia from 1985-91 and was awarded an MBE for his charity work. He says: 'I would be surprised if it were any less than 10-20 per cent of funds were diverted to the rebels.

'Did I sympathise with the rebels? Yes. We would not have tolerated any direct assistance in the purchase of arms or condoned it, but just remember it was a highly complex situation.'

James, a farmer who is now 85 and living in Devon, adds: 'I think it is ridiculous for anybody to claim that not one penny of aid money was diverted.

'You couldn't help the hungry in the rebel-held areas without helping the rebels. You have to be realistic about that. It is probable that some money was diverted to buy arms. I believe a just use was made of the money. I think it fulfilled the interests of the donors.'

It's looking increasingly like Geldof's fixation on the one quote in the World Service programme that 95% of aid was misdirected in Tigray is the classic approach of finding one thing wrong, in an attempt to discredit the whole. The sort of tactic that people who don't believe in global warming use.


Downloadable: MGMT

Vowel-free ecstasy, as RCRDLBL brings you MGMT. Flash Delirium's just turned up for downloading.


Embed and breakfast man: Vince Clarke

Whoever would have expected Dell to add to the quality of Friday morning? Their MotherboardTV has been out to give Vince Clarke the chance to enthuse over electrical things that make noise:


Gordon in the morning: What news of JLS today?

Perhaps aware that running a pointless JLS story every day is starting to make him look like a man with either a financial or recreational interest in their success, Gordon Smart gets a grip this morning.

and runs two non-stories about JLS instead.


Thursday, March 18, 2010

Beyonce: If you liked it, you should have put a fact-checker on it

An email from Columbia records - sent to seemingly everybody in the world - comes with an attached pdf containing an apology from Neon Magazine:

Statement

We do have serious doubts in the truth of many statements of the interview of Ms Beyonce Knowles, published in Neon, issue January/2010.

The article was written by the freelancer Ingo Mocek. The editors-in-chief have confronted Ingo Mocek with these doubts. Ingo Mocek was not able to verify certain statements, particularly the statement regarding a marriage contract of Ms Knowles.

Therefore, we assume the interview did not take place as claimed by Ingo Mocek.

The interview claimed that Beyonce and Jay-Z had signed a prenuptial agreement worth 10 million dollars if the marriage lasted ten years, with an extra million added every twelve months after that. Oh, and that she'd not actually told Jay-Z she wanted kids - because that's the sort of thing you bring up during an interview with a German-language magazine - and that Jay-Z didn't realise women don't always wear make-up and high heels. "I want to sit around at home, sometimes in sweatpants" Beyonce "told" Mocek. None of this, apparently, struck the editors at Neon as in any way odd for a woman like Beyonce to be sharing in this way, through this channel.

Neon have apologised, and told Ingo that, perhaps, it might be better if he didn't turn up with any more things for them to print.


Liberal Democrat peer reveals self to be in own pocket

You'll recall our friend Lord Clement-Jones, who effectively attempted to cede law-making powers to a few record companies by pasting the BPI's choice of wording as an amendment to the Digital Economy Bill?

It turns out that along with offering Sony and Universal the chance to have a go at writing a law, he also neglected to mention that when he's not nipping into the Lords to tell us what to do, he works - sort-of - for a legal firm that isn't disinterested in the issue of copyright law:

Lord Clement-Jones is a partner at DLA Piper, which has worked closely with the FA Premier League to clamp down on websites offering live coverage of football games without the organisation's permission, and also advised Universal Music about its digital music plans. The amendment he moved could have resulted in YouTube being blocked.

It's not just the laws of common decency that suggests he might have mentioned that he had a financial interest in extending the boundaries of copyright law; it's also the rule of the Lords, too.

When The Guardian asked him how come he never mentioned this at the start of the debate, as he's supposed to, the noble Lord had a bit of a bluster:
Clement-Jones said it would be "completely ludicrous" for him to declare an interest before every debate which might touch upon the activities of DLA Piper's clients. "When did you ever see a partner in a law firm declare their partnership before the beginning of the debate?" he said.

"Do you know how many clients we have in DLA Piper? Thousands upon thousands. We have 70 offices across the world, we act for every side of the argument: for content providers, internet service providers, technical companies who provide the hardware, software, a massive range. It would be completely ludicrous.

"I am not particularly sympathetic to the idea that I have got to stand up and tell everybody that I am the partner in DLA Piper every time I open my mouth."

No, that might be a bit of a faff, I can see that. Here's an idea though: if you have thousands and thousands of reasons why your interventions in the Lords might intersect with one of your clients, why don't you remain sitting down and keep quiet? Better yet, how about turning in your furry collar and stop embarrassing the Liberal Democrats by being neither liberal nor democratic.


Mike Joyce out of The Smiths says there's more to life than being a member of The Smiths

The Smiths' Mike Joyce, of The Smiths, has been remembering his time in The Smiths and reflecting on how, while it was great being in The Smiths, he doesn't need the ego-massage that comes of having been in The Smiths these days.

He said, "The buzz never really abated, even on the last tour for the last album, I remember the last tour we did of America, we played to about 15 to 20,000 people in Boston. We had come off stage and I had to do a quick wee and I remember hearing like just 'Smiths Smiths Smiths,' I thought 'f------ hell'."

These days, though, said The Smiths drummer, he's just as happy being someone who used to be in The Smiths as he was when he was actually in The Smiths:
"Of course I enjoy it. But I enjoy things like yesterday, the weather. I think that's what it's like -- being in my 40s now -- I thought to myself, 'what an absolutely gorgeous day,' I've got tulips in the garden and my poppies are coming up and I thought 'great.' It wasn't as euphoric, but it was a real kind of buzz I was getting. I want to do well but you can't have it all."

Mike Joyce used to be the drummer in The Smiths.


Getting to know Justin Bieber

Justin Bieber - played by Chip off Kate And Allie - has been doing an online fan chat, punctuated only twice when he thought the person putting the questions was just grooming him.

It's a fascinating insight into the mind of a young boy, assuming you accept that the mind has been replaced with a box churning out instant focus-group results:

"My fans inspire me, as well as my mom inspires me and my dad and God inspires me. I've looked up to a lot of musicians, like Michael Jackson and Boyz II Men. ... I met Boyz II Men. I didn't get to meet Michal Jackson."

Funny thing is, you can bet that Jackson would have been thrilled to meet Bieber.
Asked what his three wishes of all time would be, he answered, "Well, the first wish would be for unlimited wishes because that just makes sense. And then the second wish would be for, I don't know ... to be able to fly ... just fly everywhere. And then the third would be to get rid of poverty."

That's well considered. If you're flying everywhere the last thing you'd want to do is look down and see poverty underneath you.
And when one viewer asked if he'd ever date a fan, he replied, "I think that it's whatever the situation is. If that happens, it happens."

Translation: That sounds so stalker-like, it scares the hell out of me. Not to mention girls - I mean, that's all cooties-and-stuff, right? But my PR dude says to pretend there's a chance I might date a fan one day. He reassures me there's electric stun-guns and cattle prods ready to stop it happening, but it doesn't hurt sales to just pretend.


Rihanna officially looks only half a million bucks

Rihanna spends half a million dollars a year on her body, apparently:

The 22-year-old is reported to be spending £980 a day on a personal trainer and £520 on a chef.

For that sort of money, you could sit on the sofa eating chips and cake, and just have your brain stuck into a younger, fitter body each December. (Looking forward to seeing the contextual ads served around this paragraph.)

Seriously, though: a thousand dollars a day for a personal trainer? Boy, did she ever get stitched up when she went to the gym on Janaury 2nd.


Michael Jackson: The dead start to walk in their masquerade

Given that the Thriller video is basically about once-vibrant creatures crawling from the grave in a horrible, distorted, purposeless format, perhaps it's not inappropriate that they're thinking of turning it into a 3D feature:

[Director Jon] Landis also dropped the new that the owners of Jackson’s estate want to convert the music video into 3D. Landis is apparently fine with the idea even though he might not be a fan of the technology.

I imagine the way that 3D glasses make it look like someone's actually throwing money at you would help with Landis' coming to terms with the plan.

[Thanks to Michael M, who supplied the story with a one-word email - "why?"]


Vickers and arts: RCA caught like litter in the wind of public opinion

Who knew that anyone would have been waiting for Diana Vickers to release an album? And that, once it came within shouting distance, those people's reactions would not be one of stunned gratitude, but discontent?

James P takes up the story:

Diana Vickers, an X Factor reject from a couple of years back, is releasing an album soon. As is often the way, the record company thought that a good way to pique fan interest would be to tease them with a preview of the album cover artwork.

Unfortunately, the fans hated it.

The messageboards are awash with gripes. Some people hate the font, some hate the photo, some hate the colours. Interestingly though, RCA have taken these complaints on board and started to tweak the image. In what appears to be a depressing collision between pop music and focus groups, they've changed the colours used in the artwork and, as the fans are still grumbling, this may not be the last amendment they make.

It does make me grateful that the internet wasn't around forty years ago, album covers would've been rubbish. "The flowers are nice and I like the different-coloured suits, but it's too cluttered and I don't recognise most of the people. Couldn't they just use a photo of the band leaning over a bannister or something?" "What's a cake got to do with bleeding?" "Why isn't Paul wearing shoes? They should put some on him, otherwise people will think he's dead or something"

(It does make me wonder if it would be possible to organise a Facebook campaign demanding that the next Kasabian album features a photo of the band being mauled by bears, however)

It's interesting to see that RCA is responding to consumer demand so minutely. Almost as if they think they need every sale they can muster. Perhaps they should try a print-on-demand cover?


Gordon in the morning: Come on you blues

This morning, Gordon Smart claims P Diddy is about to become the latest rich American keen to have soccer fans yelling in his face about how much they hate him:

RAP star P DIDDY plans to put the Cristal into Crystal Palace with a shock bid for the struggling London footie team.

Really?
Last night his UK spokesman confirmed the multi-millionaire is in the market for Palace. He also added that the New Yorker has his eye on another big club.

A source said: "Diddy was in London meeting football fixers a couple of weeks ago. The finance is in place, he's just deciding who he thinks he'll make a bid for.

"Portsmouth were mentioned but he thought Palace were a better idea.

"He could cover their debt and bankroll a return to the Premier League. He liked the name as well."

It's not entirely clear why, if Diddy's spokesman has gone on the record, that Smart is running quotes from an unnamed source.

Still, you've got to look forward to the fans welcoming a man who has bought their club because of its name. You couldn't hope for a more committed chairman than that, could you?


Heroobit: Alex Chilton

If you're just waking up, I'm afraid it's to pretty grim news: Alex Chilton died overnight from a suspected heart attack.

Born William Alexandra Chilton in Memphis halfway through the 20th century, Chilton formed a small-time band with friends called The Devilles. A combination of line-up changes and (more pressingly) other bands with the same rotten name inspired a change to The Box Tops, with whom Chilton would go on to have a chain of hits. The first, The Letter, in 1967, kicked off a period of frantic activity. Members came, members wait, and by the time The Box Tops were done in 1970, they'd amassed a collection of ten singles and four albums.

Their success had tempted the band from Memphis, and at their end Chilton returned home. Here he joined a power trio, Ice Water. Again, there would be a name change before things really started rolling. The change of the name on the posters to Big Star wasn't, this time, quite the instant charm that the renaming of The Devilles had been, and the first two albums - #1 Record and Radio City struggled. Sure, with added hindsight, Rolling Stone could call them part of a "seminal body of work that never stopped inspiring succeeding generations". At the time, there was a slight sense of piles of unsold records stinking the place up.

Partly this was down to the label - Big Star had been a strange choice for Stax Records to sign in the first place, and they'd not really been that keen on promoting #1 Record. By the time Radio City came out, Stax had become a wholly-owned subsidiary of Columbia, leaving the band with an even better record and even less support.

The band shattered and Chilton was left pulling together the third album with a rotating, loose band - including his girlfriend Lesa Aldridge popping in to help out on vocals. Producer Jim Dickinson said:

[I was] nailed for indulging Alex on Big Star Third, but I think it is important that the artist is enabled to perform with integrity. What I did for Alex was literally remove the yoke of oppressive production that he had been under since the first time he ever uttered a word into a microphone, for good or ill.

It was a mixture of both - the good was the album, Third/Sister Lover, was a thing of great beauty. The bad was that Chilton and Dickinson struggled to find a label willing to release the thing.

In the end, as so often happens, it was British hipsters who came to the rescue. A 1978 re-release of the first two albums was instrumental in helping shift the perception of Big Star from being crazy idiots into genuine legends; the new fan base persuaded Ardent to actually release the third album.

Chilton visited London in 1979, where he recorded Bangkok, starting a period of interesting-but-wayward solo work and the half-vaudevillian Panter Burns with Gustav Falco. Depending on how far you want to buy in to the legend, The Cramps either borrowed, hired or stole a car to drive to Memphis in order to persuade him to produce their first album.

The 1980s saw Big Star's reputation grow - helped by the enthusiastic name-dropping of more successful alt-rock groups, and reaching a peak with The Replacements naming a song for Chilton. In 1993, affection having turned to a religion, Big Star reunited, bulked out by members of The Posies working on the side. Although focused on the classic 1970s stuff, there would be a new record, In Space, in 2005.

Having got the taste for reunions, Chilton also engineered a reunion of The Box Tops in 1996.

Big Star were due to play SXSW later this week. Chilton had been complaining about his health earlier yesterday. Jody Stephens of Big Star told the Memphis Commercial Appeal that “I don’t have a lot of particulars, but they kind of suspect that it was a heart attack.” Alex Chilton was 59.


Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Bloc of Ash

Russell Lissack is taking some leave from Bloc Party in order to be the all-important fourth member of Ash on their UK tour.

There's a press-release gobbet of 'how we met and fell in love':

Russell - of Bloc Party and solo project Pin Me Down - is a life-long Ash fan, "I've always loved Ash, my first ever stage performance was part of an Ash covers band, so when they asked me to join them on their forthcoming tour I jumped at the chance!"

Ash's Tim Wheeler: "We first met at South By Southwest in 2005, we’d heard he and Kele Okereke met when Russell was playing Ash songs at a party, so we've always felt that connection with him. We've loved Bloc Party since their first single and have always really admired his guitar playing."

They haven't told Russell yet that he's going to have to try and squeeze into Charlotte Hatherley's old stage outfits.


Second Spin

As part of the intense desire to scan everything ever printed, Google Books has just put the entire back catalogue of Spin online. Look, here's their review of 1998 issue in a tiny box:



So that's Spin; Plan B was released as torrents and - ahem - IPC apparently nearing the end of a ten year plan to digitise Melody Maker. Can we have Select and ZigZag in full, too, please?


Radiobit: Charlie Gillett

Sad news for fans of radio tonight, as we hear of the death of Charlie Gillett.

Born in Lancashire and growing up in Cleveland, Gillett was perhaps one of the first genuine rock and roll intellectuals - he wrote a thesis on the history of rock and roll during his time at Columbia University. Admittedly, this was in 1965 so there wasn't quite so much history of the genre, but he certainly kept his knowledge up to date and could have turned in a thesis at any time since then.

After he got back to the UK, he worked as a lecturer and a journalist, skimming through New Society and Anarchy before landing a spot with Record Mirror. A book, the Sound Of The City, confirmed that he was able to wear his rock learning lightly enough to appeal to a wider audience, and rock writing led to rock talking when Radio London offered him a weekly show. Honky Tonk would run for six years, introducing Londoners to Costello, Graham Parker and Dire Straits. You can't blame him for what Dire Straits went on to do. Nobody knew.

Working at a time when commercial radio actually behaved in the way the Tories seem to think that it still does, Gillett jumped from the BBC to Capital, where he would remain - literally due to public demand - until 1990. It was in 1983 that his show's focus spread to include what would be known as world music, but at the time was still just music. Then it was back to the BBC in London, which was going by the name of GLR at the time, along with shows on the World Service and Radio 3. He picked up the Lifetime Achievement at the Sonys in 1991 - when his radio career had only reached the half-way point, as it turned out.

He also found time to co-found a publishing company, Oval, and co-manage the pre-Blockheads Ian Dury. And, in his role as musical consultant to advertising agencies, played a role in helping Levis choose the tracks which briefly made them, and Nick Kamen, insanely popular.

Rocks Back Pages has a collection of Gillett's columns from Record Mirror.

Charlie Gillett had been suffering from a disease which had attacked his autoimmune system. He was 68.


The TUC used to be portrayed as a carthorse

It would be unfair to charcterise the Europe-wide survey being promoted in the UK by the Trades Union Congress as effectively a load of waffle-iron run-off, but it is:

Brendan Barber, general secretary of the TUC, said the study stresses that "the growth of unauthorised filesharing, downloading and streaming of copyrighted works and recorded performances is a major threat to the creative industries in terms of loss of employment and revenues".

"The scale of the problem is truly frightening now – let alone in the future if no firm actions against illegal filesharing are taken. If there was ever the proof needed to demonstrate why the Digital Economy Bill is imperative for the protection of our creative industries, this report is it."

Except it's not "truly frightening now", is it? For an industry which isn't actually selling anything essential [not in the food and shelter sense] and whose stuff is so easy to get without paying, the music business is doing pretty well - especially what with the way the general economy has been. Sony Music is happy to spend millions on buying up the Michael Jackson back catalogue. There's money to fly Dappy to America. Admittedly, both those thoughts frighten me, but not in the way you mean.

Let's fling some figures around, though, shall we?
Across the EU, as many as 1.2m jobs are in jeopardy as piracy looks set to strip more than €240bn (£218bn) in revenues from the creative industries by 2015, unless regulators can stem the flow. In 2008, the creative industries contributed €860bn to the EU's GDP – almost 7% – and it employs 6.5% of the EU workforce, or 14 million people.

It's also expected that as many as sixty million kittens might be crushed under steamrollers driven by online pirates. "They'll be laughing as they roll forward" warned the TUC, "laughing as the kittens get squished."

Of course, there's not really any reason to assume that the lack of an ever-more-tightened copyright regime would lead to steamrollers heading out over kittens, but the contention is about as strong as the figures being offered here. No attempt is made to prove the vital contention that downloading a thing represents the loss of any revenue at all; no explanation of what would happen to that £218billion pounds if it isn't being spent on buying Dollshouse on DVD or Climie Fisher CDs.

In fact, even if the survey had any basis in fact, you might argue that it'd be better for our economy if people spent the money that would otherwise be jammed away in Simon Cowell's back pocket or servicing EMI's massive debt with an American bank on, say, solar panels or eating out. Imagine if that £218bn "lost" to the creative industries found its way into the manufacturing industry.

If only it wasn't a non-existent pile of cash. Imagine the stuff we could do with it.


Morrissey knows what he likes, and it isn't Damien Hirst

Morrissey doesn't like Damien Hirst:

Discussing the artists work with artist Linder Sterling, he said: "I dislike the 'use' of animals in art, such as in the work of Damien Hirst. Do you agree that Hirst's head should be kept in a bag for the way he's utilized-and sold-dead animals?"

Charles Saatchi has already expressed interest in buying Morrissey's Hirst head in hessian sack should it ever come on the market.

Actually, that wouldn't please Morrissey, either:
Morrissey also claimed the wealth accrued by Damien - reputed to be the world's richest living artist, whose works have sold for over £10 million pounds - "reduces him to mere factory outlet".

Morrissey is famous for never charging for his gigs, and giving his records away for free.


Darkness at 3AM: Liam explains it all

The Mirror's gossip team whisks us back to the Brits:

Liam Gallagher has finally explained why he snubbed brother Noel in his Brits acceptance speech when Oasis walked off with Best Album.

There was a mystery about that? I thought we all knew he was a petulant, drunken cock?
The Oasis frontman turned fashion designer says: "I was fed up of it all being about me and Noel. I wanted to thank the other members of the band." And about time too.

Well, I suppose it's nice to see the grunts in the engine room sticking together.


Gordon in the morning: Revolution on the head

In the continuing churning of non-stories about JLS, today Gordon reaches - well, yes, another new low:

ASTON MERRYGOLD has shocked fans by shaving off his carefully coiffered locks.

Man cuts hair.

There is something interesting about the story, though:
The JLS heart-throb gave a sneak peek of his new bonce

Bonce? Bonce? Surely this is a naked noggin, Gordon, not merely a new bonce?
I don't know what his female admirers make of it but I think it looks OK.

As long as Aston's taking his male admirers with him, that's half the battle.

In other "news", Amy Winehouse mucks about with a person taking a photo of her. We know she did this, because someone took a photo of her having her photo taken. If there's a photo of the paparazzo taking the photo of the photo, I think we'd be able to approach a gallery with a fibonaci sequence.


Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Embed and breakfast man: Solex vs Cristina Martinez and Jon Spencer

I'm not usually a big fan of 'making of' videos - if I wanted to have the daylight poured in on magic, I'd buy myself a periscope and a ladder, and most album-making is like most other album-making - but Solex have come up with something a bit beyond the norm to promote their Solex VS Cristina Martinez & Jon Spencer Amsterdam Throwdown King Street Showdown thing.

This, to be precise, is what they've come up with:

Solex VS Cristina Martinez & Jon Spencer Comic Video from Bronzerat Records on Vimeo.